I’m for anything that gets you through the night, be it prayer, tranquilizers or a bottle of Jack Daniel’s. — Frank Sinatra

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Michigan: The trees are the right height

Posted by ArmedGeek on Tuesday, February 21, 2012 in 2012, Politics

No, I’m not kidding.

What the fuck is wrong with this dude?

“I was born and raised here. I love being in Michigan”, Mr. Romney said. “Everything seems right here. You know, I come back to Michigan; the trees are the right height. The grass is the right color for this time of year, kind of a brownish-greenish sort of thing. It just feels right.”

“I like seeing the lakes. I love the lakes. There’s something very special here. The Great Lakes, but also all the little inland lakes that dot the parts of Michigan.”

“You know, we’ve been to Massachusetts. I love the ocean, too, I do love the ocean, but there’s something special about lakes, where you don’t get salt on you after you’ve been swimming, where there’s no seaweed, where you don’t have to worry about things eating you in the water.”

“I grew up totally in love with cars,” he said. “It used to be in the 50s and 60s, if you showed me one square foot of almost any part of a car I could tell you what brand it was, the model and so forth. Now with all the Japanese cars I’m not so good at it, but I still know the American cars pretty well.”

Mr. Romney told the crowd that he drives a Mustang.

“I love American cars, and long may they rule the world,” he said. “Let me tell you, I want them to do well.”

I understand that all politicians pander to some degree or another, but this is just insane.

Bring on the comments

  1. Who wrote this speech? Obama’s speechwriter??

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  2. David says:

    “…trees are the right height…” and Babe the Blue Ox needs something to piss on.

    Any nonsense from The Romney Android is better than hearing it try to “talk conservative”.

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  3. Wiccapundit says:

    Including the majestik moose.

    Come see the loveli lakes.

    Wi not trei a holiday in Michigan this yer?

    (Obscure reference alert).

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  4. But meanwhile, more and more of Santorum’s insane cult-like ramblings are coming out (“Satan is attacking the great institutions of America.”)

    I thought Romney was supposed to be the one in a cult? I never thought I’d see the day when a Mormon looks like the most sane choice.

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  5. John D says:

    For the record: President Obama vehemently disagrees with Romney about Michigan. In fact, he ranks it 57th among the states, which is close to the bottom.

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  6. Jay in Ames says:

    (Obscure reference alert).

    *sacks Wiccapundit

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  7. Lizard says:

    WTF did Obama or Newt’s group infiltrate Romney and Sanitoriam’s(yes I spelled it that way on purpose) speech writers.

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  8. Aaron Burr says:

    I will cram down whatever pile of steaming dog squeeze the GOP nominates, right down all of your protesting throats.

    Obama will not have a second term. I don’t even care if Hillary Fucking Clinton ends up president.

    Mittens is a fucking silver tongued devil next to Obama and his words are as fucking golden honey poured into thine ears. Get used to it.

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  9. Wicicapundit says:

    Those responsible for sacking Jay In Ames, have been sacked.

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  10. Wiccapundit says:

    Derrr. How did I manage to misspell my name, Aggie? Fix, please?

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  11. Aaron, we are not protesting anyone. We are well aware that we have to vote against the incumbent.

    The point here is that Romney can’t afford to even sound like Obama, and yet he is doing it, right in the middle of unionistic hell.

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  12. I live in Michigan.

    Speech or no speech, he’s right about the trees. Ours are right.

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  13. Matt says:

    He reminds me of the Spongebob episode where he decided to become “normal.”

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  14. Lance McCormick says:

    Right now, I’m thinking that Romney’s main two problems is that he panders A) poorly and B) to the wrong people.

    It’s like he and John Kerry are both characters played by the same person or something.

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  15. Maestro Semprinin says:

    So super fleawit loves American cars. Does this mean he’s going to get rid of the EPA and bring back the big block V8′s?

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  16. Aaron Burr says:

    C’mon, Aggie. “What the fuck is wrong with this dude?” That’s right up there under the headline.

    I’ll tell you what’s wrong with him. He’s a Republican, not a Conservative. However, since only the republicans and Democrats have candidates that have a chance nationally, we’re stuck with those options.

    A few weeks ago, the mantra was “anyone of these fine candidates is better than Obama”. Now it’s ‘what the fuck is wrong with this guy.”

    Time’s running out, we can’t sit here and rag on some steaming pile of felch drippings because the guy’s a steaming pile of felch drippings, he is what he is. A Republican. Just like Santorum.

    In my opinion, any Republican nominee is better than Obama. I’ve accepted that. I’m at peace. Maybe by 2016 or 2020 we’ll have iur collective acts together and will be able to nominate a Conservative candidate instead of a Republican one. Until then, let’s just pick someone and roll with that choice and save the criticism for Emperor Shit Wit.

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  17. Aaron, the mantra is STILL Anyone But Obama™.

    However, when the frontrunner starts to sound like Obama, he ain’t differentiating himself well from the Prez. And that can be a very bad thing. THAT is the quibble here.

    And I agree that the criticism should be leveled at the Prez. I also wish the candidates would remember to do that more often.

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  18. Aaron Burr says:

    Sorry, I can’t continue this debate as I’m rather busy at the moment wrestling with the plastic shrink wrap imprisoning the cork in my tequila bottle.

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    Just to clarify, there’s no debate. We’re on the same page ;)

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  20. RANDO says:

    No more musloids in the WH.

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