In theory, theory and practice are the same. In practice, they are not. — Unknown, Unknown

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Bee With a Big ITCH

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Thursday, March 1, 2012 in AssHatery, Celebutards, Idiotarians, Total Bullshit

Before I start off in my rant, I do not like Danica Patrick. I don’t care that she is one of a few women in NASCAR™. I don’t care that she has given hope to future generations of little girls who want to wreck cars for a reason. No, I really don’t like her. And after this, I despise her even more.

Sports anchor suspended for calling Danica Patrick a ‘B’

And no, I’m not defending him in any way. I don’t have to.

[Ross] Shimabuku was responding to Patrick’s comment at NASCAR Media Day when she said she didn’t like the negative connotation of the term “sexy” used for her and other female athletes. “Is there any other word that you can use to describe me?” she said.

After playing that audio Shimabuku said: “I’ve got a few words. It starts with a ‘B’ and it’s not beautiful. … She always has a chip on her shoulder trying to prove something. … What she says and what she does are two totally different things.”

BINGO!!! Mr. Shimabuku called her on her hypocrisy. Notice that he never, not once, said the word in question. In fact, I can help him out. Perhaps he meant the word “bogus”, or maybe the word “bigheaded”, or maybe even the word “blustery” or even “boastful”. But let’s face it: we all know what he meant. After all why wouldn’t he, when we see this:

And we are shown this in Sports Illustrated™, because you know she’s in a sport by just looking at the pic:

Seriously, why would anyone think of her as a sex object after this:

And after learning of the slip she let slide, I’m inclined to believe her. She isn’t sexy. She’s a tramp, stamped as such, and someone who whores herself out on the pages of a magazine so that she can get attention, instead of earning accolades for any dubious skill for racing she might possess. In the words of Dave Chappelle:

The girl says “Oh uh-uh, wait a minute! Wait a minute! Just because I’m dressed this way does not make me a whore!” Which is true. Gentlemen, that is true. Just because they dress a certain way doesn’t mean they are a certain way. Don’t ever forget it. But ladies, you must understand that is fucking confusing. It just is. Now that would be like me, Dave Chappelle, the comedian, walking down the street in a cop uniform. Somebody might run up on me, saying, “Oh, thank God. Officer, help us! Come on. They’re over here. Help us!” “Oh-hoh! Just because I’m dressed this way does not make me a police officer!” See what I mean? All right, ladies, fine. You are not a whore. But you are wearing a whore’s uniform.

And that is what you do by being a hypocrite, Ms. Patrick. You wear the sexpot uniform, and turn around and decry the “negative” connotation of it. I had hoped that you would become a good role model for young women, but compounding hypocrisy with your latest bout of stupidity does not make you a good model for anyone, much less young girls.

It just makes you a BITCH!!

Hat tip: Lizard :)

Bring on the comments

  1. John D says:

    There are two ways Danica can put an end to this problem:

    1. Gain 50 pounds. People will stop calling her sexy. Instead, they’ll make fun of her weight, which she’ll probably find much more unpleasant.

    2. Win some races, then maybe people will focus on her talent, rather than her looks.

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  2. It is with sadness that I report Mr. Andrew Breitbart’s passing.

    http://biggovernment.com/lsolov/2012/03/01/draft/

  3. Lizard says:

    Nice job Aggie!!!

    I have been trying to like her since she now drives for my fave driver/owner Tony Stewart but can find no redeeming qualities, especially since she is so stupid when it comes to her faith and woman’s rights.

    I also heard from a fellow race fan that her media people actual monitor all on-air reports about her, facebook, twitter, and online stories and if she does not like what is reported or said goes after the person. That rates being called a bitch, don’t say anything bad about me or I will hunt you down.

    As for her winning races, she might be able to win a Nationwide race but I just do not see her making it at the Cup level.

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  4. QueenBee says:

    John D is spot on for number 2. I also love Aggie’s note on not being a whore but wearing the uniform!

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  5. I’ve always liked Danica, but now that she’s sold out to the big money of NASCAR bumper cars instead of sticking with the pure sport of auto racing I doubt I’ll pay much attention to her.

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  6. Maestro Semprinin says:

    Danica and Tiger deserve each other

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  7. Sentry says:

    The way I remember it, she wasn’t all that good at open wheel, either. She’s always been a sideshow. The way I react to people talking aboot Patrick is to mention Shirley Muldowney. Not only was she an attractive woman with driving skills, she was more known for winning than showing her ass, literally and figuratively.

    Shame aboot Breitbart, Aggie. I wonder what’s gonna happen with Big Hollywood now.

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  8. Harry says:

    Bitch. Maybe I’ll do a post about how sexy she is and link bomb it for the word “bitch.”

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  9. Slightly says:

    Eh, I don’t care about her one way or the other. She drives a race car for a living so that pretty much makes her a non-entity in my world. Though I have to say, I’ve started rooting for her in addition to Kyle Busch since it seems to drive all the NASCAR fans crazy.

    And before someone points it out…. Yes, I know I’m an asshole.

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  10. I fail to comprehend you all sometimes.

    a. If she’s a bitch that means she’s a demon in the sack.

    b. NASCAR driver = permanent designated driver.

    c. Even if you can’t stand the bitch, that’s still Danica Patrick working your paddle shifter.

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  11. Well, none of those apply to me, Aaron.

    And I would like to think that no matter how much of a “demon” a gal is, most men would rather pass on someone that’s a bitch.

    Heh!

  12. You’d be surprised how easy it is to trick a bitchy woman into taking out the trash, washing the dog and working your paddle shifter.

    Anyway Mrs. Sith, there’s always Kyle Busch for the ladies.

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  13. Light29ID says:

    Three races at Daytona. Three crashes. Tells you something about her driving skills.

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