ArmedGeek’s Movie List

High Noon

You risk your skin catching killers and the juries turn them loose so they can come back and shoot at you again. If you’re honest you’re poor your whole life and in the end you wind up dying all alone on some dirty street. For what? For nothing. For a tin star.

Double Indemnity

Do I laugh now, or wait ’til it gets funny?

The French Connection

All right, Popeye’s here! get your hands on your heads, get off the bar, and get on the wall!

30 Days of Night

Actually a pretty damned good vampire story.

A Fistful Of Dollars

The first of the ‘Dollars’ trilogy. Must see for Eastwood fans.

A Few Dollars More

The second of the ‘Dollars’ trilogy. Must see for Eastwood fans.

The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly

Third of the Dollars movies

Alien

If you haven’t seen this movie, you’re fucking retarted. Something is seriously wrong with you.

Aliens

American Gangster

Meh. Two damned good actors.

American Psycho

Dictionary definition of crazy-motherfucker.

Army Of Darkness

This is the third of the Evil Dead series of movies. Bruce Campbell Rocks!

Bad Santa

Billy Bob Thornton being a complete drunken dick.

Batman Begins

Breach

True story of a CIA spy. Didn’t really care for it.

Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid

For a moment there I thought we were in trouble.

Night Of The Living Dead (1968)

The original.

Dawn Of The Dead (1978)

The Gold Standard of zombie movies.

Death Race

The update to the classic. This is the one with Jason Statham. Meh.

The Evil Dead

I know now that my wife has become host to a Candarian demon. I fear that the only way to stop those possessed by the spirits of the book is through the act of… bodily dismemberment.

Evil Dead 2

The second of the Evil Dead movies.

Fantastic 4 Rise of the Silver Surfer

Jessica Alba couldn’t act her way out of a paper bag, but fucking hell, she sure is hot.

Fantastic Voyage

Donald Pleasence gets eaten by a white blood cell. Oh, and Raquel Welch

Fast Times at Ridgemont High

Spicoli!

Field Of Dreams

If you build it he will come.

From Dusk Til Dawn

Best vampire comedy ever.

Galaxy Quest

Never give up, Never surrender!

Hang Em High

mmm, spaghetti.

Hitman

meh. Movie made from a video game.

Hoosiers

Every ‘coach/sports team’ movie was patterned after this one.

Hot Fuzz

Decent flick if you like Shaun of the Dead

I Am Legend

Seriously, how do you fuck up the end of a story like this ?

I Love You Man

Oddly, a decent film.

In Bruges

Did you know Colin Farrell can act ?

In The Heat Of The Night

I do want to thank you for offering such a powerful piece of manpower as Virgil Tibbs.

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

Odd comedy-thriller with Robert Downey Jr

Ladder 49

Why does it always have to be the 12th floor? Why cant they be on the 4th?

Leaving Las Vegas

Two really messed up people.

Lock Stock And Two Smoking Barrels

Good film. And I don’t usually like foreign-language films.

Mr. Brooks

A bit different for a serial killer film.

My Name Is Bruce

A must for Bruce Campbell films.

Next

Jessica Biel

Ocean’s 11

Sinatra not Clooney

On The Waterfront

I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am.

Oscar

Never witness nuthin’. You live longer.

Pale Rider

Clint Eastwood

Resident Evil

I’m not sure I want to remember what went on down here.

Resident Evil: Apocolypse

My name is Alice and I remember everything.

Resident Evil: Extinction

You won’t have to wait that long, boys. Because I’m coming for you. And I’m gonna be bringing a few of my friends.

Role Models

L.A.I.R.E.

Rush

Stalag 17

Strange Brew

This movie was shot in 3B -- three beers -- and it looks good, eh?

Sunset Boulevard

Nothing good ever comes from a flat tire.

Sunshine

Odd, but interesting SciFi flick

Superbad

You know when you hear girls say ‘Ah man, I was so shit-faced last night, I shouldn’t have fucked that guy?’ We could be that mistake!

Taking of Pelham One Two Three

Walter Matthau not Denzel Washington

The Bank Job

Foreign language heist film

The Big Lebowski

Has the whole world gone crazy? Am I the only one around here who gives a shit about the rules?

The Bourne Supremacy

meh

The Bourne Ultimatum

meh

The Great Escape

One of my favorite films

The Hustler

Jackie Gleason as Minnesota Fats

The Kingdom

Oddly, this has been sitting on my hardrive forever and I’ve still not seen it.

The Life And Times Of Judge Roy Bean

different.

The Lost Weekend

One of the best ever ‘drunk’ films.

The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance

Spoiler: it wasn’t Jimmy Stewart

The Man Who Would Be King

Sean Connery and Michael Caine .. what more could you want? Spoiler: It was all fucked up by a woman.

The Mist

Would have been perfect if it had ended 30 seconds sooner.

The Odd Couple

We’re all out of cornflakes. F.U. Took me three hours to figure out F.U. was Felix Ungar!

The Outlaw Josey Wales

You can never have too many Eastwood westerns.

The Princess Bride

My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

The Pursuit Of Happiness

Another one I still have not actually watched.

The Ref

You think every morning I wake up, look in the mirror and say “Gee I’m glad I’m me and not some 19-year-old billionaire rockstar with the body of an athelete and a 24-hour erection!” No I don’t! So just excuse the shit out of me!

The Right Stuff

Hey, Ridley, ya got any Beeman’s?

The Searchers

The Shining

Wendy, darling, light of my life! I’m not gonna hurt you. You didn’t let me finish my sentence. I said: I’m not gonna hurt ya. I’m just gonna bash your brains in. I’m gonna bash ‘em right the fuck in!

The Way Of The Gun

A little Butch and Sundance and a little Wild Bunch

The Wrestler

Good film.

Under The Volcano

Another of the all-time great drunk films.

Untouchables

They pull a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue. *That’s* the *Chicago* way!

Usual Suspects

The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist.

Valdez Is Coming

Walk The Line

Where Eagles Dare

Broadsword calling Danny Boy

Zombie Strippers

That chick’s as cold as the dead flesh of a stripping zombie.

National Lampoons: Vacation

This is no longer a vacation. It’s a quest, a quest for fun. I’m gonna have fun and your gonna have fun. We’re gonna have so much fucking fun they’re gonna need plastic surgeons to remove the smiles from our fucking faces. We’ll be whistling zippity-doo-dah out of our ass holes