Like We Needed Proof
If you had doubts that Hollywood is an arm of the White House, you shouldn’t now.
Michelle Obama surprises Oscars by presenting Best Picture award
On an evening when the most elite gather to give each other props, I found it rather apropos to have the Cremè de Politics give the award for Best Picture.
Y’all can go vomit if you haven’t done so by now.
The Oscars, or Time to Watch Paint Dry
Tonight is that awards show of awards shows, the Academy Awards. This is the award given to those who their peers consider as having delivered the performance of a lifetime, or rather the previous ten months, really.
Fred Astaire never won.
Marilyn Monroe never won.
Peter O’Toole never won.
Cary Grant never won.
Some may have received the Lifetime Achievement Award for “sticking around long enough”. But they never won a competitive award. And that’s what counts to those myopic, fishbowl-living, Brown Derby-styling celebutardic actors. Frankly, I like to call it the Meyer Awards. Let’s face it: it’s a bunch of weenies full of bologna.
It’s too bad I gave up booze for Lent. It would have been a nice drinking game every time someone brought up some libtardic talking point in their winning speech 
Crowning Glory
I was trolling reading my social site page this morning, and noticed that three of my friends were making plans to go have a haircut and style today. I thought it was odd, because yesterday was Valentine’s Day, and I would have thought they would have gotten a new ‘do before then. But whatever flips their curl, right? Anyway, that got me to thinking about the weird hairstyles I saw at the salon.
Yes, that’s Natalie “Whining Amidala” Portman. Seriously, I was always told a lady never goes out in public with her hair half dressed, and yet there she is sporting giant magic curlers. And THAT is supposed to be attractive?? It just makes me want to throw pencils through it. Or arrows.
I’ve always lived in fear of doing something drastic with my hair, so I have no horror stories to share. But I would love to hear any *ahem* hair raisers you may have experienced or seen
Rush to Idiocy
You know, one day I will learn to NOT be surprised where Hollywood is concerned. I have a feeling that day is not in my immediate future.
John Cusack Developing Rush Limbaugh Biopic
No, I’m not making this up. Ultra-liberal making a movie about an ultra-conservative. And you just know how that will turn out.
The project, as first reported by the AP, has a working title of Rush and is being produced by Cusack’s own production company, New Crime Productions.
Because that title has never been used. And I mean NEVER!!
A shooting script is nearing completion, with the liberal Cusack, 46, set to step into the unlikely role of the 61-year-old conservative firebrand.
I can see the resemblance.
I’m hoping the ghost of Stan Winston will be guiding the make-up crew.
I think I know why the interest in a Limbaugh movie now, though.
Limbaugh has fanned the flames of controversy throughout his three-decade career, none more so than in February, when he called Georgetown University Law Center student Sandra Fluke a “slut” and a “prostitute” for advocating for insurance coverage of contraceptives. The comments resulted in widespread outrage and led to 45 companies pulling their ads from his syndicated program, The Rush Limbaugh Show.
He said she behaved like a slut and a prostitute. And by definition, he was being kind. Oh, and he lost 45 companies, but ended up having to fight off hundreds more wanting the contracts for ads on his show.
I can’t wait to hear what Limbaugh says about this. That will be epic
Sorry, Y’all
I had a very long weekend, no sleep last night, and I am tired.Sorry for being late!
However, this morning while running kids to school I heard the latest GEICO Gecko commercial on the radio.
And it PISSED. ME. OFF!!
Apparently it was targeting the South Texas audience, because the little reptile was talking about the Alamo. And he went on to say that he didn’t understand what all the fuss is about, since it’s so small, and where would anyone hide??
And I totally blew a gasket or three right then.
We didn’t hide, you little cretin. We faced the Mexican horde straight on, and died bravely. And the building may be small, but apparently you didn’t notice the entire walled area. No wonder GEICO is losing customers.
Fucking insect…
I May Never Eat Pudding Again
Ok, that’s not true. Y’all know I will. But this makes my stomach revolt against the chocolaty goodness.
“We’ve got to get the gun out of the hands of people who are supposed to be on neighborhood watch,” said Mr. [Bill] Cosby, whose remarks were the first he has made publicly about the case.
“Without a gun, I don’t see Mr. Zimmerman approaching Trayvon by himself,” Mr. Cosby explained. “The power-of-the-gun mentality had him unafraid to confront someone. Even police call for backup in similar situations.
“When you carry a gun, you mean to harm somebody, kill somebody,” he said.
Sorry, Mr. Cosby, but you are wrong. You have to remove the guns from the criminals first. I hope he has not forgotten who it was that killed his only son. I sure haven’t. And I find it rather odd that Mr. Cosby is blaming the gun and the neighboorhood watch, when he himself has said that the thug culture is to be reviled and that the black culture must begin to own up to their failings.
I understand not everyone likes guns. But to blame the guy who legally carries for the rise in crime is just plain stupid.
Bee With a Big ITCH
Before I start off in my rant, I do not like Danica Patrick. I don’t care that she is one of a few women in NASCAR™. I don’t care that she has given hope to future generations of little girls who want to wreck cars for a reason. No, I really don’t like her. And after this, I despise her even more.
Sports anchor suspended for calling Danica Patrick a ‘B’
And no, I’m not defending him in any way. I don’t have to.
[Ross] Shimabuku was responding to Patrick’s comment at NASCAR Media Day when she said she didn’t like the negative connotation of the term “sexy” used for her and other female athletes. “Is there any other word that you can use to describe me?” she said.
After playing that audio Shimabuku said: “I’ve got a few words. It starts with a ‘B’ and it’s not beautiful. … She always has a chip on her shoulder trying to prove something. … What she says and what she does are two totally different things.”
BINGO!!! Mr. Shimabuku called her on her hypocrisy. Notice that he never, not once, said the word in question. In fact, I can help him out. Perhaps he meant the word “bogus”, or maybe the word “bigheaded”, or maybe even the word “blustery” or even “boastful”. But let’s face it: we all know what he meant. After all why wouldn’t he, when we see this:
And we are shown this in Sports Illustrated™, because you know she’s in a sport by just looking at the pic:
Seriously, why would anyone think of her as a sex object after this:
And after learning of the slip she let slide, I’m inclined to believe her. She isn’t sexy. She’s a tramp, stamped as such, and someone who whores herself out on the pages of a magazine so that she can get attention, instead of earning accolades for any dubious skill for racing she might possess. In the words of Dave Chappelle:
The girl says “Oh uh-uh, wait a minute! Wait a minute! Just because I’m dressed this way does not make me a whore!” Which is true. Gentlemen, that is true. Just because they dress a certain way doesn’t mean they are a certain way. Don’t ever forget it. But ladies, you must understand that is fucking confusing. It just is. Now that would be like me, Dave Chappelle, the comedian, walking down the street in a cop uniform. Somebody might run up on me, saying, “Oh, thank God. Officer, help us! Come on. They’re over here. Help us!” “Oh-hoh! Just because I’m dressed this way does not make me a police officer!” See what I mean? All right, ladies, fine. You are not a whore. But you are wearing a whore’s uniform.
And that is what you do by being a hypocrite, Ms. Patrick. You wear the sexpot uniform, and turn around and decry the “negative” connotation of it. I had hoped that you would become a good role model for young women, but compounding hypocrisy with your latest bout of stupidity does not make you a good model for anyone, much less young girls.
It just makes you a BITCH!!
Hat tip: Lizard 
There is Never Enough Irony in the World
The Ironic Penta Meter™ is tipping off the scales this morning, y’all.
Jay-Z is releasing a new line of T-shirts in support of the Occupy Wall Street movement Friday via his Rocawear clothing label, but he doesn’t plan to share any of the profits with the protesters.
And that, ladies and gents, is rich on many, many levels. This so-called musical artist will gladly make a buck off the protesters, standing in figurative solidarity with them, but when it comes to the bottom line, will not lift a finger to help them in any way. And the dumb masses can’t see they are being used by him to increase his fortune.
Meanwhile, the spokesperson for the clothing company that is making the shirts had this to say:
“The ‘Occupy All Streets’ T-shirt was created in support of the ‘Occupy Wall Street’ movement. Rocawear strongly encourages all forms of constructive expression, whether it be artistic, political or social. ‘Occupy All Streets’ is our way of reminding people that there is change to be made everywhere, not just on Wall Street. At this time we have not made an official commitment to monetarily support the movement.”
So, to the dumb masses occupying parks in cities across the US, I hope the knowledge that Jay-Z is making money off your back and enjoying the rotten fruit of your labor all the way to the bank in no way keeps you up at night. I’m sure the lice, tuberculosis, lack of heat, and the fear of getting assaulted or even raped is enough to keep you awake.
Just wait until bubonic plague breaks out.
Maybe They Are With the 57 States?
Just when you think the journolistic intelligensia can’t be more ridiculous, they prove us dead wrong:
So enthused about promoting the far-left protests, ABC anchor Diane Sawyer on Monday night’s World News championed “the Occupy Wall Street movement” by ludicrously claiming that “as of tonight, it has spread to more than 250 American cities, more than a thousand countries — every continent but Antarctica.”
Excuse me?? A thousand countries?? What planet is she talking about?? Because last I checked, there were less than 200 countries on her precious Gaia. I’m no genius, but even I know geography. She could be forgiven* for saying a thousand cities in the US, but even then that would mean at least 20 per state. Unless there are 57 states, then it would be under 18 per state.
Newsflash, Ms. Sawyer: the rest of the world couldn’t give a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut about these protesters. They only care about our country imploding from division, something which your ilk is only happy to foment along. I don’t know if it was the shiraz talking, but do us all a favor and kindly STFU.
Hat tip: Hubby
*No, she wouldn’t be forgiven for saying an obvious lie like that. I was being kind.
Poker Night
I know I’ve been half-assed about making it to poker night. I’ll really try to be there tonight. You should know, that the server will be up even if I’m not around.
We’ve also got updated rankings for H&B Football Pick’em:
And an update on H&B DeadPool; Almost all core functionality is completed. The only thing missing at this point is the ‘Report Death’ function which should be completed in the next day or so. I’ve also uploaded pictures of the Grand Prize here.
And in the spirit of “there’s never enough Hookers” I’ll finish with a Hooker …
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