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Mar 3

Nero Called and He Wants His Fiddle Back

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, March 3, 2014 in Government, Politics, War

It’s not enough that our Prez is working hard to destroy this country. He has to make it easier for other tyrants to destroy the rest of the world, too.

Last week, the White House released a photo of our Prez talking on the phone with Russian Prez Putin. It was a rather foolhardy effort to make our Prez look tough. But as usual, it failed spectacularly.

obama putin call

Reportedly, this call lasted 90 minutes. This is how I imagine the call went.

BO: Hey Vlad, how’s things?

VP: Hallo comrade! Things are good, very good. Enjoyed some time in Sochi and now going to enjoy some time in The Crimea. And what about you? Taking another vacation?

BO: Really thinking about it right now. Listen, about Crimea… Um, would you mind just holding off for a bit?

VP: Why, Obamushka?

BO: Look, I’m out of red lines and some people expect me to come up with one.

VP: Red line? Is this new drug, like ecstasy?

BO: I wish… I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but the thing is, you going to Crimea looks like an act of war to some people, and frankly, I am trying my damnedest to get rid of OUR military right now, and you are making the argument to keep OUR military at current levels here. You have to work with me!

VP: I have to work with you?? Do I have to remind you who is my bitch here, Obamushka?

BO: No…..

VP: Good. Now, be a good cyka and keep rattling the saber. Your supporters still believe in you to transform your country. Just as my supporters believe in me to transform mine, da? Now, I have to go. My jackboots just came back from being shined.

Why so short a call? Putin probably kept Obama on hold for 80 minutes.

Feb 17

Irked

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, February 17, 2014 in AssHatery, Celebutards, Government, Rants

Yes, I am thoroughly irked.

Some days ago, a celebutard whose career had stalled came out of the closet and declared her gayness over the media, and everyone went batshit. This right after some NFL hopeful came out of his closet to embrace his sexuality. These announcements dominated headlines for days, and in places they still do. And anyone who complains about the notoriety they are receiving gets shunned as an intolerant bigoted hater.

Meanwhile, protests in Ukraine, Syria, and Venezuela are beyond bloody, and most people remain ignorant and unaware. A bus of Korean Christians on tour in the Holy Land gets bombed by a suicide jackass, and no one hears about it. A co-pilot hijacks an Ethiopian airplane causing a mad scramble by several countries’ fighter jets, because he wanted asylum. Sweet Meteor of Death is going to zoom quite close to this planet, but not close enough. And in that other world we call Inside the Beltway, Republicans know that our Prez is violating the Constitution, but acknowledged they likely have no way to stop him, so they won’t even try.

Yes, I am irked. I do not care if you are straight or gay. If you are honest with yourself about your sexuality, good for you. Be proud, and move the fuck on. It is none of my business if you are gay or straight, or asexual for that matter. It is only YOUR business.You want me to cheer for you? Give of yourself, without thought of credit. I may get shit for this but in my opinion, coming out of the closet makes you look like an attention whore. You want it to be acceptable? Then be normal about it. No need to announce it to the fucking planet.

This celebrity cult we spawned is a death cult. We are ignoring the signs of our country’s demise in favor of who wore it best, or who vacationed where, or which bitch is the tackiest housewife of Beverly Jersey. It galls me that people know more about Charlie Sheen’s porn star fiancee than they do about their own country’s fiscal death spiral.

Jan 10

Legal Stupidity

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Friday, January 10, 2014 in Government, Idiotarians, Open Thread

Amazing how even dumb laws not only get passed, but stay on the books past their use.

Take my fair state. I love Texas, but sometimes you have to shake your head at some of the laws to which we still abide. Did you know that it is still illegal to take more than three sips of beer while standing?

Anyone been to a club or bar lately??

There are laws against sitting on the sidewalk, selling Limburger cheese, and if you steal cattle, you can STILL get hanged. By the way, people are hanged, inanimate objects are hung (SYWM!!!). In San Antonio, it is still illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation.

Anyone been to a club or bar lately??

caught lol

I understand that some of these were enacted in a different time, but Limburger???

What are some weird or stupid laws in your corner of the world? And have you bent it? ;)

Dec 16

Wealthcare.gov

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, December 16, 2013 in Government, ObamaCare

I shouldn’t laugh, y’all. This crap is serious, but sometimes I can’t help it.

For the second week in a row, the Washington Healthplanfinder website is down, and it’s causing problems for people who are dealing with billing issues. Some of them say the website is mistakenly debiting their accounts.

Shannon Bruner of Indianola logged on to her checking account Monday morning, and found she was almost 800 dollars in the negative.

“The first thing I thought was, ‘I got screwed,’” she said.

I am not laughing at their quandary. I am laughing at the fact that EVERYONE CALLED THIS. And still people didn’t listen.

One [KGW] viewer emailed KING 5 saying, “They drafted my account this morning for a second time.”

Amazing how the site can’t operate correctly, and is usually down, but damned if they can’t manage to get your money, TWICE.

Washington Healthplanfinder emailed the Bruners a few days ago telling them to log in to view their invoice, something they couldn’t do because the website has been down. The Bruners haven’t been able to get through on the helpline either. They finally contacted Healthplanfinder administrators by posting a message on their Facebook page.

Washington Healthplanfinder is reportedly looking into the problem. Meanwhile, the Bruners can’t go shopping for Christmas gifts, or even pay their nanny. I don’t even know if they have healthcare insurance.

But I do know the IRS won’t garnish their return. This year, anyway.

Dec 6

I Wish I Had Made This Up

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Friday, December 6, 2013 in Government, War

Seriously.

NORL-39 octopus logo

“NROL-39 is represented by the octopus, a versatile, adaptable, and highly intelligent creature. Emblematically, enemies of the United States can be reached no matter where they choose to hide,” said Karen Furgerson, a spokeswoman for the NRO. “‘Nothing is beyond our reach’ defines this mission and the value it brings to our nation and the warfighters it supports, who serve valiantly all over the globe, protecting our nation.”

Cthulhu was unavailable for comment.

Oct 9

Generation Bubblewrap

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Wednesday, October 9, 2013 in AssHatery, Government, Political Correctness

It started off as a good morning for me, perusing the social-site-with-faces, reading link after link about how truly destructive this Administration is, the random funneh, and some weird news for the day. It was all good until I read about the utter pussification of our children nowadays.

Then I got all pissed off and started honing things.

exercise stamps

These stamps that were to be issued by the USPS were inspired by the “Let’s Move!” Campaign. Personally, I find the campaign to be a waste of money and time, but every First Lady needs a cause. The stamps are somewhat generic, and though they skim the impressionistic arts, they are cute. But guess what? The entire run, ALL OF IT, will be destroyed, costing tens of thousands of dollars if not millions. At first I thought it was because no *ahem* kids with disabilities were portrayed. Or perhaps things were too “vanilla”, with the possible exception of the basketball player, and that’s another whole can of worms. No, the reason for the scrapping of the stamps is not due to the politically correct flavor of the day, but rather that kids may get hurt being active.

[T]he USPS will be destroying the entire press run after receiving concerns from the President’s Council on Fitness, Sports & Nutrition over alleged “unsafe” acts depicted on three of the stamps (cannonball dive, skateboarding without kneepads and a headstand without a helmet). (There’s also a batter without a batting helmet, a girl balancing on a slippery rock, and a soccer player without kneepads or shin pads.)

What the everloving SHIT?? Headstand without a helmet?? Since when is a helmet mandatory for a headstand?? This is how you raise drones and sheep, people. You scare them into thinking they will get hurt and die without the government telling them what they can and cannot do. My kids all had bike helmets and knee pads. Ask me how often they wore them. If you guess “once” you would be right. Sure, they got hurt, and they learned from their mistakes to do better next time, without the pampering. Why is it a crime to let a kid get a few bruises?

But hey, they just want what’s best for us. That is why the same people are in charge of our healthcare, our taxes, and our rights. So go ahead and wrap your kids in bubblewrap before letting them do anything remotely fun. It’s for The Greater Good™.

Hat tip: Michael Graham

UPDATE!!

Sorry for bumping the HOTW. Go look at her now and get some measure of happiness for today!!

Jul 22

This is What It Sounds Like, When Islam Cries

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, July 22, 2013 in Awesomeness, Government, Islamofascist nutjobs, religion of piece

North Carolina clangs its brass.

The state Senate on Friday passed a bill that would keep courts from recognizing Sharia law.

While proponents of the legislation said it would keep people safe from foreign laws, critics derided the bill as sending a message of intolerance and bigotry to followers of Islam.

Go ahead, laugh for a while. I did. It took me several minutes to stop. I mean, when the most intolerant religion-slash-political-ideology on this planet calls something “intolerant and bigoted”, you know you’re winning. The provision was actually attached to another measure that would impose stricter regulations on abortion providers in NC. But the libs were so busy trying to argue the abortion regulations that they didn’t even notice the itty bitty bill emphasizing Constitutional law as being supreme. It was rather glorious.

Now called House Bill 522, the provision’s contents haven’t changed. It reminds judges that the U.S. and N.C. constitutions are the law of the land and no foreign law can supersede them. Sometimes international laws are used in court as evidence before a judge, or in written opinions. But this bill would stop judges from considering foreign law when it violates a citizen’s constitutional rights.

I have a big problem with Shari’a law. A very big problem. That particular *ahem* rule of law tramples over my rights as a human being, not to mention as a woman, a mother and a Christian. And I find it hilarious that liberals are quick to defend its use over our rule of law, when its a religious rule of law. And by “hilarious”, I mean “sickening”. What about that whole “separation of church and state” stuff liberals are always shoving down our throats?

The danger doesn’t come from the legislation’s exact wording, said Omid Safi, a professor of religious studies at UNC-Chapel Hill. He contends this wave of anti-foreign-law legislation comes from a fundamental misunderstanding of Sharia law and a “bigoted” perception of Muslims.

“We would be delighted to have a conversation about what Sharia law actually is and what it is not,” he said. “It would be important, if we’re passing legislation on the topic, for (lawmakers who support the bill) to actually benefit from the expertise of people who might actually know something about the subject.”

Here’s the thing, Omar baby:

WE DON’T GIVE A SHIT WHAT SHARI’A IS OR ISN’T. WE ALSO DON’T GIVE A SHIT WHAT AN “EXPERT” ON IT HAS TO CONTRIBUTE. WHY? BECAUSE THE SUPREME LAW OF *THIS* COUNTRY IS THE U.S. CONSTITUTION. END OF FUCKING DISCUSSION.

And if you and your ilk don’t like it, go back to a country that does, fuck you very much.

Jul 15

The Force is Strong in This One

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, July 15, 2013 in Everyday Hero, Government

Saturday came the news, most glorious.

AG Abbott formally kicks off gubernatorial bid

I squealed with glee for almost two hours.

Already well-known in political circles and extremely well-financed, Attorney General Greg Abbott formally announced Sunday he’s running for governor, hoping to seize the fiercely socially conservative mantle of Gov. Rick Perry that has helped make Texas the country’s largest red state.

AG Abbott was the man to give Ted Cruz his start as Solicitor General. To say that Abbott is conservative is to underestimate his commitment to liberty. Anyone who says, “I go into the office, I sue Barack Obama, and then I go home,” has my support, and my vote.

Greg Abbott1

I can already taste the sweet, sweet tears of the liberals in this state. The panic they felt was so palpable, it registered on the Richter Scale.

BRING IT ON!!!

Jun 24

Looking Backward

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, June 24, 2013 in Government, Politics, Rants

I seldom write about this, mostly because it’s a very divisive topic. But sometimes the stupid must be highlighted, even at the expense of pissing y’all off.

Texas House approves abortion restrictions in early-morning vote

And ZOMG!! The world ends!!

The measure would ban abortions after the 20th week of pregnancy, require doctors to have admitting privileges at nearby hospitals and limit abortions to surgical centers.

So, that gives women roughly four months (yes, I realize it’s five months, but most women don’t realize they are pregnant the first month or so) to decide if they wish to keep their embryo fetus clump of cells baby, time to find a doctor who has access to a hospital bed for you in case something goes wrong, and give you a nice, secure, CLEAN AND STERILE place to have the “procedure” done. I do NOT care where you stand on this. I don’t. But this “War on Women” shit that the Left keeps waging has got to stop.

Why do I say the Left is waging it?

…opponents point out the bill would shut down 37 out of 42 abortion clinics in the state.

“If this passes, abortion would be virtually banned in the state of Texas, and many women could be forced to resort to dangerous and unsafe measures,” said Cecile Richards, president of Planned Parenthood Action Fund and daughter of the late former Texas governor Ann Richards.

That would be the same Cecile Richards who terminated her first two pregnancies at a private hospital. The reason she didn’t terminate her third? She just “couldn’t go through the anguish again.” I am not kidding. But her actions aside, how does making sure that women get this procedure from a qualified doctor in a surgical center a bad thing?? How is THAT “dangerous and unsafe”??

Is this the fucking Twilight Zone?

But the best line?

“We are willing to have an attack on women in order to have someone’s political agenda achieved,” Rep. Sylvester Turner, D-Houston, said in opposition to stopping debate on the bill. “It may be in the dark of night now … but the sun will shine on each and every one of us, and we will be held accountable.”

Yes, you freakin’ idiot. YOUR PARTY is the one attacking women. YOUR PARTY is pushing a political agenda. And YOUR PARTY will be held accountable for the destruction of so many. YOU will be exposed for the blatant shill you are.

Horrifically, the Texas Medical Association, the Texas Hospital Association and the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists all sent letters asking them to vote no on this bill. I can only assume that Obamacare plays a part in their decision to decry the bill. Whatever the reason, I will no longer trust any doctor who is a member of either of these “associations”.

Because in this case, if it could save one child, then it’s a bad thing to promote.

Jun 12

Yes, We Scan!!

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Wednesday, June 12, 2013 in Awesomeness, Government, Scandal

Apparently, it takes a German to do the job.

fairies PRISM poster

Via Nerdcore, hat tip The Daily Caller.

And remember:

O-ppressive

B-ureaucracy

A-lways

M-onitoring

A-mericans

YOU GET THAT, NSA??? Hope I spelled everything right for you.