I don’t speak female speak, I don’t understand it in written form, and even translated it makes less sense than seal barks. — The Glorious Lemur King

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Apr 18

Piss Off, and Gargle Vinegar

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Friday, April 18, 2014 in AssHatery, Idiotarians, Politics, Rants, terrorism, Total Bullshit

One never knows what will set a woman off.

I was minding my own business yesterday, shopping for a dreaded dress to wear for my niece’s wedding (because she has told me in no uncertain terms no black, white, or dark colors. That leaves my entire closet out), when I hear a news clip about Senator Harry Reid (D- Nevada) calling those who stood with rancher Cliven Bundy “domestic terrorists“.

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid said he believes the supporters who rallied around Nevada rancher Cliven Bundy in his fight against the federal government are “domestic terrorists” and Bundy does not respect his country.

Searching for a dress didn’t make me upset. Getting caught in a storm didn’t get me upset. Having to cater to my youngest because she doesn’t like my cooking didn’t get me upset. Being honked at by an impatient person who wanted my parking slot didn’t get me upset. Having five Mexican nationals cut in front of me at a store pretending they didn’t see me there and snickering about getting away with “cheating the gringa” didn’t get me upset.

Don’t worry. I called them on it. And smiled while doing so.

But this? This elitist dickwrinkle telling me that people who stand in opposition to more government control are domestic terrorists???

reid arrogance

Listen, you disgusting excuse for pig offal, you are an elected official. You’re not royalty and the people of Nevada are not your subjects.

THEY ARE YOUR BOSSES.

YOU ARE THEIR SERVANT.

This is supposed to be a government of the people, for the people, and by the people. You seem to think it is a government for your personal use, to increase your graft and power over those who “don’t know any better”. Unlike you, you perverted whey-faced ass boil, the people still recall that. And because they know this bloated, debt-ridden government came with limits, and they have the utter nerve to call you on it, you decide they are terrorists? Words have meaning, you canker. Your ideological side has embraced the words of that illustrious Nobel Piss Prize winner, Yasser Arafat: one man’s terrorist is another man’s freedom fighter. Remember that, you twisted scrotum sac?

Well, guess what? This country has a metric fuckton of freedom fighters, and you just managed to wake a shitton more. Welcome to the party, pal, and yippey kay AY!!

Motherfucker.

Apr 11

Sauce for the Gander

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Friday, April 11, 2014 in Idiotarians, Open Thread

I was perusing Drudge Report this morning laughing over a shoe, a resignation, and a tantrum, when a certain link caught my eye.

University of Connecticut officials have suspended a sorority as they investigate allegations that its members forced men to drink booze, eat dog treats, paint their bodies, wear women’s underwear and take alcohol shots off each other’s bodies.

Now, at first, I had to laugh. My first thought was, “Suuuuure…. the guys were promised the Land of Plenty in return for playing along.” After all, they were members of a fraternity, and most likely have experience in what I call “quiet hazing”, where pledges have to do some weird shit in order to get in, but nothing so auspicious that the members would get arrested for harassment and hazing. But then I re-read the article again, and it gave me pause.

delta_zeta_logo_lg

What if they were threatened?

Greek mixers are a staple in colleges. One sorority invited one fraternity for a party, they make t-shirts and sell them to raise money to pay for the drinks and food. Happens all the time. But in this day and age, I can no longer assume that the guys were “promised” anything, especially when sexual harassment laws on college campuses have been twisted so much that now men carry the burden of being told they are guilty without due process, and can lose everything. I wouldn’t put it past the gals to have threatened them with rape and police enquiry if they did not participate. I am not saying that happened. But I do think that the possibility percentage has increased dramatically in the past few years.

Am I making a mountain out of a molehill? :D

Mar 24

At Least It Starts With the Letter “U”

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, March 24, 2014 in Idiotarians, Politics, War

As the world watches Ukraine and Putin, and begins to wonder what happened to Georgia (the republic, not the state), our esteamed* Prez and leader of the somewhat free world decided it was time to get serious and get involved.

In Uganda.

Again.

Early Monday, the White House confirmed a Washington Post report that the U.S. was sending “associated support personnel,” and a “limited number” of CV-22 Osprey aircraft to assist local forces in their long-running battle against Kony’s Lord’s Resistance Army, or LRA. Obama sent about 100 U.S. troops to help the African forces in 2011.

The administration did not specify how many troops and aircraft would be sent to Africa, but the Post reported that the president had ordered four Osprey aircraft and 150 Air Force special operations members and airmen to Uganda.

I’m all for helping the oppressed, don’t get me wrong. But having studied Sub-Saharan African cultures, and the geography, I’m pretty freakin’ sure they will never find much less catch that Kony character anytime soon. Besides that, I have to ask, how does his capture secure the freedom of not just the people of Uganda and the Central African Republic (so-called), but also of the US? Just how is Kony a threat to Western interests? He has no nuclear capabilities, no organized army divisions, nothing but a mythical shroud to provide him cover. This is akin to the Ugandan Army sending troops to Los Angeles to capture the Hillside Stranglers.

Meanwhile, Vlad “Impale Them All” Putin is poised to go to war over Ukraine as a probable second step (don’t forget Georgia, the republic, not the state) in his quest to re-establish Russia as a superpower and making Poland, Hungary, and all the other former bloc nations very, very nervous, since the US no longer has their backs. But the Prez will write a sternly-worded letter or reprimand while trying to calm the European countries on his tour.

He will no doubt try to douse that conflagration with just enough gasoline.

* Yes, I spelled it that way on purpose ;)

Mar 10

Blind Squirrel, Etc.

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, March 10, 2014 in Idiotarians, Left Wing Media, Politics

This past Saturday evening was the 129th meeting of the Gridiron Club Dinner, a white-jacket event which is hosted by the créme de la créme of the Washington press corps.

I’ve always wondered about this club. It’s odd to have members of the press in an exclusive and elite club, when they are supposed to be open about everything. But whatever.

Anyway, the evening’s headliner was none other than Secretary of State John Kerry. In a moment of rare clarity, Monsieur Kerry delivered the ultimate burn to erstwhile king of news, CNN.

During a humorous and well-received speech, Kerry, the evening’s headliner, said that CNN’s John King had asked if the former Massachusetts Senator was considering another presidential bid in 2016.

Kerry’s response: “I am out of politics — and based on the ratings, so is CNN.”

And though mon cher Kerry wasn’t the only one to zing CNN, he was the most devastating. I must say, it was rather funny to see le bete noire Kerry beat down the channel that propped him up in the first place. A blind squirrel can find a nut once in a while, I guess.

Then again, it doesn’t take a lot of effort or fight to kick an opponent when he is on life support, either.

Mar 7

Well, Damn…

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Friday, March 7, 2014 in AssHatery, Celebutards, Idiotarians, Rants

Look at that. It’s Friday and time for the Open Thread.

Today’s OT deals with entitlement. Specifically, that young woman who felt the need to sue her parents after storming out of her home in a huff.

rachel lol

I’m not a fan, as you can tell. I read an interview with her father, a former police chief, who claimed he was a very liberal parent, and only wished HIS parents had been so lenient.

Hey, Chief Barbrady, that is WHY your spawn felt the want to sue your ass.

I don’t care about this family at all. They all deserve each other. As far as I’m concerned, the parents should pay for her shit as punishment for raising such a princess, and in return, she should be forced to go to a public school in Trenton and state college.

What fitting punishment would you give them??

Feb 24

Buh-bye, and I Hope They Go in Threes

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, February 24, 2014 in Awesomeness, Celebutards, Idiotarians

This weekend amid the heart wrenching hells of Venezuela, Ukraine, Syria, Thailand, and God only knows how many other countries, comes some good news. First off, Alec Baldwin is just plain givin’ up.

baldwin gives up

He’s just tired of being hounded by the “Gay Department of Justice”, y’all. He is tired of fighting TMZ photogs and wants to quit public life, so logically he is leaving NYC to move to LA, you know, home of TMZ and Hollywood.

Logic is not his friend.

On the heels of that bit of serendipity, comes the news that Piers Morgan’s show has been given the axe. And I don’t mean rank deodorant, which in hind sight would have been an improvement. I guess viewers of all political and ideological leanings got tired of his condescending schtick. Sure didn’t help that he came to a country that beat his own with muskets, either. And I am sure that being a know-it-all didn’t fly well, especially in view of his many phone hacking scandals during his time as a tabloid editor back in UK. Common manners dictate that you don’t shit on your host’s welcome mat.

As to the third, we can only speculate on who it could be. Personally, I’m kinda hoping it’s the entire cast of The View :D

Jan 10

Legal Stupidity

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Friday, January 10, 2014 in Government, Idiotarians, Open Thread

Amazing how even dumb laws not only get passed, but stay on the books past their use.

Take my fair state. I love Texas, but sometimes you have to shake your head at some of the laws to which we still abide. Did you know that it is still illegal to take more than three sips of beer while standing?

Anyone been to a club or bar lately??

There are laws against sitting on the sidewalk, selling Limburger cheese, and if you steal cattle, you can STILL get hanged. By the way, people are hanged, inanimate objects are hung (SYWM!!!). In San Antonio, it is still illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation.

Anyone been to a club or bar lately??

caught lol

I understand that some of these were enacted in a different time, but Limburger???

What are some weird or stupid laws in your corner of the world? And have you bent it? ;)

Nov 18

Monday Morning LOL

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, November 18, 2013 in AssHatery, Idiotarians, Left Wing Media, Rants

I love perusing the social-site-with-faces. I get to see the funny stuff, get news links with you know, ACTUAL NEWS, updates about family and friends, and of course, the requisite LSD-fueled screeds that just make my mornings.

This Monday’s entry is from none other than the Puffy Ho®. Y’all can go look for it. I can’t link it here. I just showered and we are under water restrictions. Again. Anyway, it is titled, 12 Reasons Why Obama is One of the Best Presidents Ever.

Quit laughing. I haven’t even started fisking it yet. He begins with duality.

With tears in my eyes, and joy in my heart, I stood alongside people of color across the nation as we celebrated America’s first inauguration of a black president. As a young black man, I felt a true sense of patriotism as I witnessed our country rally together to show, finally, that we are more concerned about who is the most qualified man for the job, regardless of race or age.

Uh huh. So you are happy a black guy won but it has NOTHING to do with race. Got it.

He goes on to say that sure, the Prez has had a few missteps, just like any other president. He says that after he claims the predecessor was a “colossal failure”, ok? And then, hilarity ensues.

1-- He is one for The People.

As long as “The People” means his campaign contributors and apologists, sure.

2-- He is for civil rights.

Tell that to those still screaming for same sex marriage, to the whistleblowers who are in hiding for outing the NSA, and TEA Party members being given a colonoscopy by the IRS.

3-- He is for one race -the human race.

I did snarf at this. Thoughts of George Zimmerman, Sgt. James Crowley, the people threatened by the Black Panthers all come to mind. And if you think of that too, then you’re RACIST!!!

4-- He is for a healthcare system that brings hope and healing to the hurting.

But you can’t hope to keep your insurance or your doctor.

5-- He is for the middle class.

BWAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

*sniff, chortle*

BWAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Sorry, I can’t help it. Better to laugh than to think of the total debt accruing on the middle class’ shoulders.

6-- He is for women’s rights.

Meanwhile not a peep from him regarding the vile comments made at conservative women, such as Sarah Palin. But Hera forbid anyone take a swipe at Sandra Fluke and her $3,000 contraception.

7-- He is for doing away with pomp and circumstance.

Golfing, million dollar vacations, and monthly concerts by hip musicians do not count. And the Greek columns couldn’t be reached for comment.

8-- He is for the environment.

I don’t know about y’all, but I’m still waiting for the oceans to recede and the planet to heal.

9-- He is for veterans.

This, as he makes suggestions to change the benefits and attempts to charge them for their healthcare. This, as he shuts them out of their own memorial. By the way, how many brass have been fired now??

10-- He is for peace.

Syria, the Arab Spring, Iran, Afghanistan, Benghazi…..

11-- He is for education.

Common Core, anyone?

12-- He is for entertaining the masses.

TOTUS could not be reached for comment.

If y’all feel like reading the article, it’s under The Blog at the Puffy Ho®. But best be prepared to spew your drink and take a long shower afterwards.

 

Apr 15

Got Valium?

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, April 15, 2013 in AssHatery, Bonus Hooker, Idiotarians

Because you’ll need it. That, or liquor. Whatever gets you through the day.

Secretary of State John Kerry will meet with the family of diplomat killed in Afghanistan. The families of Ambassador Chris Stevens, Ty Woods, Glen Doherty and Sean Smith couldn’t be reached for comment.

Rochester, NY, decides to spit on history. I mean, what the shit did we fight the Brits for again?

Californians are A-OK with being subjects. Screw that “liberty” crap and pass them more weed.

Here, have a happy.

red ruffles and stockings

I do like her shoes. They make me happy. Hope y’all have a good one! ;)

Apr 8

Because Being Offended is the Easiest Way to Shut Down the First Amendment

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, April 8, 2013 in Idiotarians, Political Correctness, Total Bullshit

I am ashamed to report that not even my alma mater, Texas A&M University, is safe from the evuls of diversity.

Last week, several students at Texas A&M took to their Senate to object to having a portion of their student fees pay for the Gay and Lesbian Students Association. Personally, I don’t care if my school has such a student group. I believe in freedom of association, after all. However, some students did not wish to have their fees go to fund a group that goes against their religious beliefs.

See where I am going with this?

Anyway, the Senate voted 70-65 to approve ‘The Religious Funding Exemption Bill’, which states:

“While it can be argued that many services are a worthy use of funds in order to provide an opportunity for academic success at Texas A&M, it is reasonable for students to object to a use of their own money that they feel violates their religious conscience. The broad varieties of religious views expressed by students are equally important, and the variety of services they disagree with should be treated with equal importance.”

How about that? Actually observing and enforcing the First Amendment, which this being a state school, they have to actually, you know, OBSERVE AND ENFORCE. Had TAMU been a private university, it would have been different. But never underestimate the power of idiots ignorance academia diversity. While the Senate can approve or disapprove a bill, the Student President has final veto, and guess what he did?

Texas A&M Student Body President John Claybrook [on Friday] ‘confidently’ vetoed a very controversial measure approved yesterday by the student senate which allows Aggies to withhold the portion of  their student activity fee which would go to the Gay Lesbian Bisexual and Transgender Student Center.

Because the needs of the many never outweigh the needs of the weepy few.

“This has caused great harm to our reputation and to the students who feel disenfranchised by the bill,” he wrote in a message.

Never mind the hundreds he just disenfranchised in the name of his goddess, Diversity. Gay trumps every time.

“This damage must stop today. Texas A&M students represent our core value of respect exceptionally, and I am proud of the family at this university.  Now, more than ever, is the time to show great resolve and come together, treating each other like the family that we are.

Just how is squelching someone’s religious freedoms showing respect? I don’t know about y’all, but in my family, no one agrees with anything, not even when it comes to Coke™ versus Pepsi™. This dickwrinkle believes that in order to show respect, you must trump one group above others. When I attended A&M, some of us decided to form a “dead group”, for archaeology. Guess what? We got NO FUNDING from the student fees. We had to raise our own funds to do anything. Why can’t they, as well?

This student president may claim to espouse Texas A&M as a family, but he has no idea what being an Aggie means. He barely cuts it as a 2%er. I hope all of the disenfranchised religious groups appeal, and bring to light the roaches pushing politically correct diversity down their throats.