So Aggie posted a list of things that irritate her.

Here’s mine:

People spending more than $20 in the drive through.

Look here, the drive through is for people in a hurry, not for you fuckers that are just too damned lazy to get out of you fucking car and waddle your fat ass into the fucking McDonalds.

People driving at anything less than the speed limit in the middle lane of the freeway.

Holy fuck, jackass. You’re not just an irritation, you are a fucking road hazard. You’re a damned danger to yourself and everyone else on the road.

People that bitch about their low pay.

You agreed to do the job .. for that amount of money. Your employer did not keep your pay rate a secret from you. Really, kwitcherbichen*. I suppose I might have a bit more sympathy for someone who’s been on the job for a long while and had they’ve seen their workload increase much faster than they’re pay rate. Still, you agree to do the job for the pay offerred every time you show up to work.

People whose position is greater than their skills.

Everyone makes mistakes. I get that. But, seriously, if I’m regularly cleaning up after your fuckups then you are worse than useless. You are a Goddamned speed-bump. I would much prefer you just sit there and do nothing.

People who are unaware of those around them.

I’m talking about the jackass that comes to a complete stop in the middle of the aisle at the grocery store because something caught their eye while never realizing that there’s three people behind them that also had to stop. I’m talking about the shithead that wants to stand around chatting with the cashier when there’s a dozen fucking people waiting behind them. I’m also talking about the waste of oxygen that takes their overflowing grocery cart to the fucking express lane. I’m not talking about the people that just don’t care about other people. Those folks are just dicks. I’m talking about the ones that are completely unaware that there are other people around them.

People that use a hands-free bluetooth earplug to talk on the phone and look directly at you while they’re doing it.

It only makes it worse when they do say something to you in exactly the same tone of voice they’re using on the phone.

People that think now is the worst things have ever been.

Yep. The economy is in the shitter and we have a socialist as a President. Things have never been this bad. And they believe this as they drive their $20,000 car, watch the news on their big-screen television in their air-conditioned/heated home. They complain as they look at their full refrigerator that there’s nothing good to eat so they make a call on their cell phone to have someone bring them food. Yeah. Things have never been this bad. I’m honestly not sure how we make it through the day.

People that cry about the homeless

Looks to me like that dude made some really poor life choices. But they were his choices.

People that cry about starving children

Let me make this clear: There are no starving children in this country. If there are, someone is actually breaking the law. Seriously, you don’t even have to be actually poor for the government, the schools, the church or the community to feed you and your kids.

Related to the two items above: People that cry about the state of third-world countries

No amount of money or food will fix those countries. It won’t. Many of those countries are shitholes due to cultural or governmental problems. Which returns us to poor choices. Many generations of poor life choices and it isn’t going to stop because we give them money or food.

Cats

No way would I own a pet that holds me in contempt. Although, feeding random strays is usually a good idea. Keeps down the populations of small rodents and bugs. Once you let them in the house though, they lose all humility.

Wow. That really took a turn from a list of pet peeves to a full blown rant.

* kwitcherbichen is not really as German as it looks.

Just to be clear, it would take a hell of a lot to get me to ban someone from a blog. Frankly, I haven’t reached that point yet. I have come close, but that was probably due to hormones having a bad day.

Now, many commenters here at H&B have blogs, as well. So I wondered, what would be the last straw that would cause a banning? I would ask those who don’t blog where would they draw the line?

Obviously cussing around here is standard, so that wouldn’t even make a blip in the H&B Ban Radar™!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0S7Vw7Wfu5g

You can plan for tax cuts or tax increases. You can plan for government regulation. You can plan for recessions and booms. You can plan for natural disasters. You cannot plan for random behavior. Even from the left this guy’s behavior makes little to no sense.

There’s never a clue what this moron is going to do next. From the EPA to the ATF to the DOJ to random executive orders. There’s no way business can plan in this environment because there’s no way to know what’s going to happen tomorrow.

A completely random Hooker

That is why the economy is slowly but surely slipping back into recession. Businesses never know who Obama’s next target is going to be. I mean, Gibson Fucking Guitars …. who could have seen that coming? By now we’ve all accepted that to this idiot drilling for oil is evil, but now apparently so is transporting oil across the country via pipeline.

You can’t even predict when this lazy fuck is going to show up for work either. That is, unless you intend to hold meetings at the golf course.

In short, we’re screwed until he’s gone.

Some have said that if the economy improves before next November he might get re-elected. Well, shit that’s not going to happen as long as he keeps being … well, himself.

Oh, and now it seems he’s decided to crawfish on the new EPA regulations … more random behavior.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OkebmhTQN-4

I’ve often said that the US is the only country in the world with fat poor people. While not completely accurate, it does get the point across.

I watched the Prez’ speech. It was only a small bit of it, I swear. STOP JUDGING ME!! He started off by blaming Bush, no surprise there, and went on to ‘splain to the little people that you have to spend more during a recession. But then he shifted gears a bit, telling the masses that neither party is blameless for this, but both have a responsibility to stop it. My ears perked up then. And then, the hammer:

Keep in mind that under a balanced approach, the 98% of Americans who make under $250,000 would see no tax increases at all. None.  In fact, I want to extend the payroll tax cut for working families.  What we’re talking about under a balanced approach is asking Americans whose incomes have gone up the most over the last decade – millionaires and billionaires – to share in the sacrifice everyone else has to make.  And I think these patriotic Americans are willing to pitch in.  In fact, over the last few decades, they’ve pitched in every time we passed a bipartisan deal to reduce the deficit.  The first time a deal passed, a predecessor of mine made the case for a balanced approach by saying this:

“Would you rather reduce deficits and interest rates by raising revenue from those who are not now paying their fair share, or would you rather accept larger budget deficits, higher interest rates, and higher unemployment?  And I think I know your answer.”

Yes, he invoked Reagan, too. That wasn’t the surprise, since his administration has been trying for months to make him look Reaganesque. No, the surprise was in the bold text. He mentioned “balanced approach” several times. This speech was NOT about the economy, the debt ceiling, the budget, or anything serious and emergent. This was a campaign speech, pure and simple. And he goes on to prove my point:

Most Americans, regardless of political party, don’t understand how we can ask a senior citizen to pay more for her Medicare before we ask corporate jet owners and oil companies to give up tax breaks that other companies don’t get.  How can we ask a student to pay more for college before we ask hedge fund managers to stop paying taxes at a lower rate than their secretaries?  How can we slash funding for education and clean energy before we ask people like me to give up tax breaks we don’t need and didn’t ask for?

That’s not right.  It’s not fair. We all want a government that lives within its means, but there are still things we need to pay for as a country – things like new roads and bridges; weather satellites and food inspection; services to veterans and medical research.

Notice the wedges he is driving between “classes” of people as he defines them, pitting senior citizens against corporate jet owners, (it’s always corporate jet owners), students against hedge fund managers, (making sure to twist a bit of Warren Buffett’s secretary administrative assistant’s tax woes), and ending with a hue and cry for the Departments of Education and Energy, which coincidentally, are the two departments at the top of the conservatives’ “To Abolish List”.

And then he gives us the famous liberal canard: IT’S NOT FAIR!!! We in the real world have news for the Prez and his followers: Life is never fair. She never once claimed to be, and if you had a grasp of reality, you would see that Life laughs at you at every turn. And what weather satellites? I thought NASA had been relegated to do Muslim Outreach? And medical research?? Do NOT get me started…

I had to cut it off by then. I was done listening to campaign speeches back in 2008. I hope Boehner keeps that rod of iron in his spine a bit longer, or he may find it shoved somewhere else come 2012.

When they tell you what kind of toilets you can have in your house, you have too much government.

When they close down your lemonade stand or tell you that you can’t sell Girl Scout Cookies, you have too much government.

When they tell you that you can’t text while you’re walking, you have too much government.

When they make your dishwasher stop working, you have too much government.

So many times I see liberals argue that excessive government control is not the problem, but that corporations unduly influence lawmakers to pass laws that favor the corporation. Well, fuck .. If the government had no authority to force you to buy health insurance then it wouldn’t do any good for a corporation to attempt to bribe them into requiring it.

Too fucking much government.

I told her CA best worry about San Andreas, since if the BIG ONE hits, half of the state would fall into the sea.

She asks me, “Don’t you have any compassion for those poor people??”

I tell her, “Mom, those people are the ones that chose to live on a major faultline, and they are also the ones who push for greenie crap, and also the ones who are fine with saving a minnow over saving the livelihood of thousands of farmers. So, my answer would have to be ‘no’ on this one.”

She told me to try to have a good day. I love my mom

These colors don't run. And go with everything.

I lived in Puerto Rico until the summer of 1976. I knew very little of American History, so imagine my surprise when everything, and I mean everything was red, white, and blue. I only knew three or four words in English, but I learned it in less than a year. The threat of being sent back to live with my grandmother was a great motivator. My family assimilated into the American culture, even though we lived in a predominantly Mexican-American area, about 20 miles from the border from Mexico. For a time we lived in a house that was right by the railroad tracks. And yes, we would see illegal immigrants travelling along those tracks, and come to the backyard to drink from the garden hose. Back then, they would never have bothered us. Nowadays, no one is so sure. No matter what, my parents insisted we learn the American way of doing things, while keeping honest to our Puerto Rican roots. We were no longer living on that tiny island. There were different rules, and we lived by them. THIS is how one assimilates. And I never, ever had a problem reconciling both sides of the coin. Until now.

I have an uncle whom I love dearly, but whose politics I despise. I learned from an early age to not open that can of worms, even when I was liberal in heart. He is an Independentista, a member of the “Green Party”, which advocates for Puerto Rico’s independence (not envirowackery, but I’m sure the party has its share of those). And his heroes: Blanca Canales, and Che Guevara. Everyone knows about Che, so I don’t need to wax rhetoric about him. Blanca Canales was a woman from my home town. Her brother, Nemesio, has numerous schools and buildings named after him, as well as an award for Literature. But whereas Nemesio used the law in his political activism, his sister subverted it. She is credited with possibly being the first female to try to overthrow the US government. Lest you think the transition from a property of Spain to a property of the USA was smooth, there were may clashes between the US government and the Puerto Rican nationalists for decades. It wasn’t exactly a time for peace, and in fairness both sides reacted forcefully, to say the least. But enough about that. My dad never taught me about her, only about her brother. In fact, she lived in my hometown until she died, in 1996. And still I was never the wiser. I know, I know…when am I getting to the point? Trust me, you needed to know this background.

The whole shitstorm started when I saw a pic of my uncle’s bar. He has an awesome bar, and right above it, he has several pictures. Che and Blanca are the prominent ones. I asked my dad how my uncle, who I absolutely adore, could have a pic of a murderer in his house. My dad told me of my uncle’s beliefs regarding Che, and Blanca, even how my uncle was part of Blanca’s procession when she was buried. Needless to say, I was appalled. My uncle, a man who is well educated, and was vice president of the largest bank in PR, worshipped Che. So, being the idiot that I am, I called and asked him why. And the conversation was not pretty. I was accused of being an American, of forgetting that I was Puerto Rican first, and that being American was being a traitor to my home. That is the worst offense I could ever commit, in his eyes. And it was a long time before I could respond to it. But I did respond:

You see, I AM AN AMERICAN. Yes, I was born in PR, and yes I am proud of my roots. But I see the enormity and the utter folly of having PR become a state, much less an independent country, when they have no industry but tourism and coffee. I see how dependent Puerto Ricans have become on government welfare, and it sickens me. I see how they are quick to accuse the military of being derelict, and how quick they are to complain about the fall of revenue when the military leaves. I see how the public news channel has to be cut, and they cry censorship, forgetting who pays their wages. I see how college kids demonstrate in the streets against fill-in-the-blank, and then go back to their homes to do their own thing, forgetting their “cause”. I see my cousin bitch about the wealthy not paying enough in taxes, and see her moving from Miami to PR to escape paying taxes. I see people blaming the government for any lack they have, and see them do nothing to help themselves. I get a call from a cousin I haven’t spoken to in over 20 years, asking me for money, because “you have more than me, so you need to share it.” I see all that and wonder where my Puerto Rico went. And for once my uncle had nothing to say. I may not have changed his mind. Hell, he’s 70. I’ll never change his mind. But he was forced to see that his Puerto Rico was no longer, and a fragile truce was declared.

So yes, I am an American first. Being Puerto Rican is part of who I am. Being American is everything I always wanted to be.