Headlines
Man Robs Bank Armed with McDonald's Apple Pies
Police Arrest Naked Man Found Covered in Peanut Butter & Chocolate
Man Dies After Swallowing Dentures During Sex
'Soul Train' creator Don Cornelius dead
James Farentino dies at 73
White Castle Considers Offering Beer and Wine(I thought is where people went when already drunk)
America is Drunk(someone needs to slap Dr. Keith Ablow or buy him a drink or two)
Occupiers Pissing on Churches Housing Them (Literally)
We Have Arrived
It was only two weeks ago that I took the rather presumptuous step to send in Rule 5 links to the fabulous blog known as The Other McCain. Many, many bloggers are linked, including our friends SOYLENT GREEN and Mike and the Argentines at El Opinador Compulsivo. But H&B had never been linked, because we are rather small, or maybe because we never read the rule about sending links to TOM. I’m pretty sure the latter was the main reason. Anyway, as I was clearing the Spam, I found a pingback to TOM’s Rule 5:
We start with three submissions from Hookers & Booze, followed by the midweek and Thursday night Rule 5 breaks at Randy’s Roundtable. Fishersville Mike brings us some teen spirit with Kaley Cuoco, and the POH Diaries favor us with Kate Upton down on the farm.
That’s right: H&B was listed first!!! WHOO HOO!!! Break out the bourbon, we have arrived.
And I well know that SG has been listed first many, many times, but I want my 15.6 seconds of fame 
And to celebrate, here’s a hooker for y’all.
Enjoy your Monday!
Starry, Starry Night
It has been quite a while since I did an astronomy picture at H&B. There are so many to choose from, but I always turn to the classics.
This is a close up of the light echo from V838 Monocerotis taken in September, 2006. A gorgeous pic of Monocerotis can be found here.
Have a great weekend, and don’t forget, tonight is a full moon. Enjoy the heavens
Best Spam Ever
And I don’t mean the canned kind, though I admit to liking it. No, I mean the interwebtubenets Spam that we get in our blog. This has to be the best one yet:
We have theft, liquor, Mafia, and balls. That right there beats Engrish anyday.
Forget Ruby Slippers
Stilettos are IN!!!!
A woman allegedly beat her boyfriend to death with the spiked heel of a stiletto shoe.
Thelma Carter, 46, struck her live-in boyfriend Robert Higdon, 58, with the shoe at their trailer park home in Augusta, Georgia, police said.
Never underestimate the weaponry at our disposal, gentlemen.
Pretty AND practical.
Deadly in more ways than one
Crossposted at Sithy Things.
Sunday Funnies: Patriots Edition
I am running on low sleep and low caffeine, but need a pick-me-up. And what better way to get happy than to showcase true patriots?? No better way, I tell you!!!
No, this is NOT turning into a cat blog. This is about patriotism, dammit, and incidental hookers FTW!!
Hope y’all have a great Sunday!!
Saturday Groove
Once again, I got nuthin’. But it’s Saturday, and since I’m cleaning, I will have some music playing. So, I thought I would share my awesome taste in music with y’all 
Now, for something with more pep:
And finally, winding down after a long day of laundry and scrubbing toilets:
And yes, I’m drinking coffee in a cup with a saucer, and my pinky is out!!
Have a great Saturday 
Bite Me!!!
You appeared from nowhere and shamelessly, without any reservations, you laid on my naked body…you sensed my indifference, so you applied your hungry mouth to me without any guilt or humiliation, and you drove me near crazy while you drained me.
Finally, I drifted off to sleep.
Today when I awoke, you were gone, I searched for you but to no avail, only the sheets bore witness to last night’s events. My body still bears faint marks of your enthusiastic ravishing, making it all the more difficult to forget you.
Tonight, I will remain awake, waiting for you…….
F**king mosquito!!!!!
Hat tip to DaninVan for today’s funneh
Sunday Funnies
Because we can always do with a laugh, after dealing with teens and paint.
I wonder if the whales get valet parking?
I do hope it’s not a cactus. Or a Venus Flytrap…
There is absolutely nothing to add here.
Aren’t they all??
Have a great Sunday
It’s Hot
It’s quite hot. Very hot. Africa hot.
The humidity doesn’t help either. Here in my corner of Hades, it’s a cool 86* degrees overcast, with 84% relative humidity. It’s also 8:30 AM.By noon, it will be about 97*, and the heat index will make it feel like 105*. And then in the afternoon, it will get hot…
I have a feeling I will be jumping the sprinklers today as I get the patio ready for Eldest’s party tomorrow.
Why couldn’t she have been born in springtime??
Crossposted at Sithy Things
Capes and Tights
Everyone has had the dream of being a superhero. When I was little, I would tie a kitchen towel around my neck, and pretend to be any hero, out to save the world from my mother’s liver dish. My sister and I would take our second-hand Barbies and bend them in half, to be used as rayguns against the evil guinea fowl horde. Sometimes, if we had access, we would get a couple of pairs of my mom’s pantyhose to complete the look. Pantyhose, swimsuit, kitchen or bath towel, and we were INVINCIBLE!!
At least until my mother would go to get a pair of hose for church, and find it ripped to shreds.
When she did, we both hoped we were Invisible Man.
My liking for superheroes dwindled as I grew up, but I still have my favorites. Batman, because he has no superpowers, just those wonderful toys. Wonder Woman, no explanations necessary. But Superman is a bit too hoity-toity for me. Seriously, a pair of glasses for a disguise??
So, what kind of cape did y’all sport?
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