AMARETTO SOUR

• 1 ½ ounces Amaretto
• 1 to 2 ounces Sweet and Sour Mix

Pour ingredients in a shaker filled with ice, shake well, and strain into a ice-filled glass. Garnish with cherries and/or orange slices. Personally, the orange makes it a bit too acidic for my taste, so I just place cherries in mine. Believe me, you never feel it until it hits you

POINSETTIA

• 1 Tbsp. Grand Marnier, or Triple Sec
• 1 Part Cranberry Juice
• Champagne
• Juice of ½ lime (optional)

There are several variations of the cocktail. One version has you mix the triple sec and cranberry juice, then adding the champagne and floating the lime juice on top. Another has you pour the cranberry juice in the glass, add the champagne, and float the Grand Marnier, skipping the lime juice. Whichever you prefer, I hope it helps you to enjoy the holiday!

Hat tip to Vmaximus

But this is what the GDOTW is for!

The Hot Toddy

• 1 Tbsp Honey
• 3/4 cup Hot Tea
• 2 Shots Brandy
• 1 slice Lemon
• 3-4 Cloves (optional)
• Cinnamon sticks (optional)
  

Brew your tea (or just do hot water, if you prefer), add honey and brandy, stirring well. Pierce lemon slice with cloves, and float on top, adding cinnamon stick. This may not cure your cold, but it will make you not care you have one

However, if there is one thing the restaurant at Neiman Marcus can be counted on, it’s to provide a frou-frou drink made from designer liqueurs, and charge you an arm, a leg, and a unit of plasma for it. At least they now share their recipes free of charge. I still remember the poor man who was charged $250 for the Neiman Marcus Chocolate Chip Cookie recipe. Thanks to the interwebtubenets, he got his revenge.

White Raspberry Cosmo

• 3 oz. Chambord™ Vodka
• 2 oz. Cointreau™
• 1 oz. Lime Juice
• 2 oz. White Cranberry Juice

Shake over ice, strain into two martini glasses and garnish with a raspberries. The recipe makes two servings, or one serving if you use a RedNek™ Wine Glass, or if you drink your martini from a measuring cup.

Like y’all have never done that!!

BRANDY ALEXANDER

• 1 ½ oz. Brandy
• 1 oz. Dark Creme de Cacao
• 1 oz. Half-n-Half
• ¼ tsp Grated Nutmeg

In a shaker half-filled with ice cubes, combine the brandy, creme de cacao, and half-and-half. Shake well. Strain into a sugar-rimmed cocktail glass and garnish with the nutmeg. You can also use grated allspice. I like using a combination of cinnamon, allspice, and nutmeg for a very autumn-y flavor. Brings to mind pumpkin pie, only with BOOZE**.

* According to Bako, this is a Grandma drink. According to me, Grandma had it going on if she was getting sloshed to this.

** Still G0000000gling for hits.

For me, it’s all about the glass. The BOOZE* has to be in a pretty glass. That’s probably why I gravitate towards martini-like drinks so much. And probably why I own ten Lolita™ martini glasses. But presentation counts, right? I was going to do Tequila Sunrise, but I hate drinking BOOZE* from a highball. It makes me feel like I’m hiding the fact that I’m drinking BOOZE*.

So I give you instead, the Washington Apple Shot:

WASHINGTON APPLE SHOT:

• 1 oz. Whiskey (BOOZE*)
• 1 oz. Sour Apple Schnapps(BOOZE*)
• 1 oz. Cranberry Juice
• Splash of Sprite or Tonic Water

Pour whiskey, schnapps, and cranberry juice into a cocktail shaker with ice. Shake well, and strain into a cinnamon sugar-rimmed martini glass. Add Sprite or tonic water if desired. Garnish with an apple wedge.

*Yes, still doing the shameless G00000000gle whoring.

Vodka or gin in a martini??

I did a search for "sexy martini", and this came up. AWESOME!!!

Now, before LC Draco decides to wax poetic here (because he thinks he is the resident expert on a martini), I well realize that gin is the correct answer. That’s not the point. Nor is the point about the correct vermouth, or type of olive to use.

No, my question is why vodka over gin?

I order a martini, and the bartender gets the Absolut™. Seldom do I see a bartender reach for Tanqueray™. And I think I know why…

Not as deadly as 014, though.

I ♥ James Bond like any normal, red-blooded woman would, but did he have to fuck it up for everybody just so he could be different? Seriously, that was a total dick move by Bond. Not that I would ever tell him to his face.

Unless it was Lazenby. Then I would.

No, it wasn’t me who drank it.

Anyway, as I was putting stuff in the freezer, I found a bottle of Absolut Vanilia!! WHEEEE!!! Of course I had to go look through their recipes. And lo and behold, I had enough stuff in my fridge and alchy cabinet to mix one of these:

ABSOLUT VANILIA ALEXANDER

1 part vanilla flavored vodka

1 part dark creme de cacao

1 part heavy cream

dash of nutmeg

Fill a shaker with ice cubes. Add all ingredients. Shake and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Garnish with grated nutmeg.

This is a nice take on the Brandy Alexander. Not too sweet, and very satisfying

First, how insulting is this?

Our Mission Statement: To build confidence and empower women through education, quality tools and an independent business opportunity.

Today, while our mission statement rings as true as ever, our slogan is shorter and more concise. Our slogan underscores the power of Tomboy Tools in the marketplace and the value we provide both to female customers seeking hands-on education with high quality tools and Home Consultants looking for a great career.

Really? The key to advancing women in construction careers is pink tools? Funny, I don’t remember this chick ever needing pink tools:

Next we have the 10 Least Romantic Love Songs.

REO Speedwagon: “Keep On Loving You”

“You should’ve known by the tone of my voice, maybe
But you didn’t listen
You played dead, but you never bled,
Instead you lay still in the grass, all coiled up and hissing”

The chorus, with its promise to “keep on loving you,” made this song a staple of those “As Seen on TV” love song compilation CDs. This verse however reads like bad poetry by a rageaholic husband from a Lifetime Channel movie. First he gets mad at her for not reading the tone of his voice correctly. Then the woman in question plays dead, presumably so he’ll stop hitting her. But, as he points out, she wasn’t bleeding. So, you know, he did her a favor. Then he calls her a snake, making this one of the most hate-fueled lyrical barrages this side of “Bulls on Parade.”

But it’s not REO Speedwagon’s fault. He puts up with so much. Besides, REO Speedwagon only does it because he loves us so much.

Time for a hooker.

10 Easy Ways to shorten your lifespan:

Facts about Sex:

After that, I think we need another Hooker:

Here’s a list of the 10 Manliest Alcoholic Drinks:

If you’re looking for a manly shot, then the four horsemen is a classic choice. Equal parts tequila, Jagermeister, Rumple Minze and Bacardi 151, the drink is about as tasty as a teacup filled with rubbing alcohol. If you’ve got something to prove, then this is the drink to order.

On this day in 1944 USS Missouri (BB-63) the last battleship built by the United States Navy and future site of the signing of the Japanese Instrument of Surrender, is commissioned.

And I guess we should finish this off with another Hooker:

As a side note, this year I purchased Lolita glasses for all of my sisters and sisters-in-law. And for me. Of course for me. They all come with recipes, some of which I am hesitant to try. But once in a while, the recipe listed just screams to be done.

This is one of those times.

The Pink Panties:

3 oz vanilla vodka
1 oz light cream
Juice from a few crushed strawberries
Sugar cube

In a shaker, place vodka, cream and juice. Shake well with ice. Rim martini glass with sugar, and place sugar cube in glass. Pour mix slowly, and garnish with strawberry slices.

And the perfect vehicle for that libation:

Make sure to appreciate the moms this Sunday!!!