Headlines
Police Arrest Naked Man Found Covered in Peanut Butter & Chocolate
Man Dies After Swallowing Dentures During Sex
'Soul Train' creator Don Cornelius dead
James Farentino dies at 73
White Castle Considers Offering Beer and Wine(I thought is where people went when already drunk)
America is Drunk(someone needs to slap Dr. Keith Ablow or buy him a drink or two)
Occupiers Pissing on Churches Housing Them (Literally)
I guess JoePa can discuss with God if he "did the right thing" now..
Hooker of the Week
Courtesy of Theo, and thanks to XBradTC. Because I have better things to do than look for scantily clad women 
No Coal For YOU!
Well, it’s that time of year again. The time when people everywhere are scrambling around to get their Christmas gift shopping done before the inevitable “What did you get me??” moment sets in. There is nothing attractive about someone with a deer-in-the-headlights look on their face. Especially when it’s your significant other who should know better by now.
Moving on (before a tirade sets in), here is a gift guide for the holiday that will hopefully make things easy….well, easier….ok, not get anyone in trouble.
As a general rule, women hate getting clothing for Christmas, unless they get to pick it out themselves. Sometimes our significant others tend to buy the wrong size. This is a losing situation for them: too small, and we cry about needing a bigger size, or too big, and we cry because they think we are fat. But PJs are different!! The only thing men have to remember is what kind to get. Trust me, you do not want to get a hankie with straps at Victoria’s Secret when your beloved prefers 7 oz weight flannel.
Or vice versa.
Anyway, you can’t go wrong with a PajamaGram. They have beautiful PJs in different styles, and all of them come in a sweet hatbox. You can even have the PJs personalized.
Comfy and cute! And warm…very warm!! And you can wear these all day. Total win!!
Another good gift to give is the gift of scent. Trust me when I say that a woman is more apt to be impressed by a bottle of perfume than by a car deodorizer, ok? However, a man can’t just pick something willy-nilly and think he’s going to get kudos. Tresór by Lancôme may be the second best selling perfume in the world, but that doesn’t mean it will smell like it on her skin. Perusing her vanity table and paying attention to what she wears is crucial here. If that isn’t a possibility, then go out of this world to get her something special!
Zen perfume was synthesized from the scent of roses that were sent up to the space station. Turns out, the scent of roses change when in zero gravity. Yes, I want to grow roses in zero gravity now. What??
Of course, some of y’all will just be too terrified about picking the wrong thing, be it clothing or perfume. In this case I say, go for the bling. Jewelry never fails, as long as it’s not a gangster emblem hanging from a huge chain. That’s just tacky. Necklaces and bracelets are always a safe bet, because you don’t need to know sizes for rings, or if she has pierced ears (you should know these things by now, but I will cut you some slack here). A very popular trend right now is the charm bracelet. Some, like Pandora™ and Trollbeads™, tend to be very pricey, but there are other options that are more affordable, like Brighton. They have a huge selection of charms, which makes making a unique personalized bracelet very easy.
Just remember to pay attention to her favorite things, and you can’t go wrong!
Hope you enjoyed shopping with Aggie. The next instalment will be Blood, Sweat, and Tears. Also known as Valentine’s Day 
*Crossposted at Sithy Things.
The Last One
Today marks the end of an era. The traditional rivalry between Texas A&M University and University of Texas will play their last game this evening. There’s a lot of history between the schools, and suffice it to say, some of it is….not too pretty. But all things, good or bad, come to an end.
By the way, just who is watching The Longhorn Network??
Video hat tip to LC Draco.
Climb Aboard!!
Courtesy of our friend Bako!!
If y’all ever wondered if there was shuttle service to Hades, now you know
A little OWS fun
Creatively Borrowed from TheBlaze:
Your revolution is over, Mr. Lebowski. Condolences. The bums lost. My advice is to do what your parents did; get a job, sir. The bums will always lose. Do you hear me, Lebowski? The bums will always lose!
Here’s a little brain cleanser for making you listen to hippies.
The Walken Dead
Stolen Creatively borrowed from Veeshir
Occupy THIS!!
With all the so-called “occupations” going on, one would think that there are only two percentages out there. If you aren’t the 99%, you are the 1%. Only in math is this not patently idiotic. Most of us here fall under the 53%, or are fighting hard to be in that category. But the most special fall under the .45%. That’s right: POINT FORTY-FIVE PERCENT!
So, to the infiltrated 99%, who can’t tell they are being used by the marxists, communists, and nazis infiltrating their so-called movement, and especially to that horrid excuse for a breeding female who claims she is doing exactly what the military does, I give y’all a hearty SCREW YOU!!
And hat tip goes to LC LtC 
True Occupier
I was at LeeAnn’s yesterday, trying to keep myself laughing while I organize today’s slumber party for Little One, when I saw this:
This is the work of Exurban League. They are now in the demigod ranks.
Be Still My Heart
This morning I’m trolling Fecesbook and ZOMG!!!!
That’s right: TREKKIES, not TREKKERS!!! I’m having the best morning EVAH!!!!
Girlie Drink of the Week
It has been a while since I wrote about BOOZE*. Between Hubby’s wonderful visit, and the kids’ schooling, I have had little opportunity to write a post about BOOZE* that appeals to the female readers of this blog. That’s not to say I didn’t enjoy BOOZE* while Hubby was here, or when the Nomstress was visiting, because if I recall, we did manage to consume quite a bit of BOOZE* during their stay.
The recycling bin was pretty full
Anyway, our friend Bako was kind enough to inspire me. Actually, I asked him if he could recommend a girlie drink, and then he said he would never do such a thing, but being the kind and thoughtful soul he is, he took pity and suggested a very simple and refreshing cocktail.
TEQUILA GIMLET:
- 1 oz. Lemon Juice
- ¼ oz Rose’s Lime Juice
- 2 oz Silver Tequila
Shake well with ice in a shaker and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Garnish with sugar and lime slices, if desired.
I did it as Bako suggested, using all fresh lime juice. And at that ratio, I’m sure it would knock me out, so I did 2 oz. of lime juice to 1 oz of tequila.
It knocked me out anyway.
*My shameless attempt to get on the front page of G00000gle for the term BOOZE.
UPDATE!!!!
I have to underline here that our friend Bako only suggested the cocktail as he makes it, which is equal parts of lime juice and tequila.
He is in no way associated with ever suggesting the use of Rose’s lime juice. Ever. In anything. Eleventy!!!
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