Obama has proven to be the largest Nigerian email scam in the history of the world. — Dick

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Mar 24

At Least It Starts With the Letter “U”

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, March 24, 2014 in Idiotarians, Politics, War

As the world watches Ukraine and Putin, and begins to wonder what happened to Georgia (the republic, not the state), our esteamed* Prez and leader of the somewhat free world decided it was time to get serious and get involved.

In Uganda.

Again.

Early Monday, the White House confirmed a Washington Post report that the U.S. was sending “associated support personnel,” and a “limited number” of CV-22 Osprey aircraft to assist local forces in their long-running battle against Kony’s Lord’s Resistance Army, or LRA. Obama sent about 100 U.S. troops to help the African forces in 2011.

The administration did not specify how many troops and aircraft would be sent to Africa, but the Post reported that the president had ordered four Osprey aircraft and 150 Air Force special operations members and airmen to Uganda.

I’m all for helping the oppressed, don’t get me wrong. But having studied Sub-Saharan African cultures, and the geography, I’m pretty freakin’ sure they will never find much less catch that Kony character anytime soon. Besides that, I have to ask, how does his capture secure the freedom of not just the people of Uganda and the Central African Republic (so-called), but also of the US? Just how is Kony a threat to Western interests? He has no nuclear capabilities, no organized army divisions, nothing but a mythical shroud to provide him cover. This is akin to the Ugandan Army sending troops to Los Angeles to capture the Hillside Stranglers.

Meanwhile, Vlad “Impale Them All” Putin is poised to go to war over Ukraine as a probable second step (don’t forget Georgia, the republic, not the state) in his quest to re-establish Russia as a superpower and making Poland, Hungary, and all the other former bloc nations very, very nervous, since the US no longer has their backs. But the Prez will write a sternly-worded letter or reprimand while trying to calm the European countries on his tour.

He will no doubt try to douse that conflagration with just enough gasoline.

* Yes, I spelled it that way on purpose ;)

Mar 3

Nero Called and He Wants His Fiddle Back

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, March 3, 2014 in Government, Politics, War

It’s not enough that our Prez is working hard to destroy this country. He has to make it easier for other tyrants to destroy the rest of the world, too.

Last week, the White House released a photo of our Prez talking on the phone with Russian Prez Putin. It was a rather foolhardy effort to make our Prez look tough. But as usual, it failed spectacularly.

obama putin call

Reportedly, this call lasted 90 minutes. This is how I imagine the call went.

BO: Hey Vlad, how’s things?

VP: Hallo comrade! Things are good, very good. Enjoyed some time in Sochi and now going to enjoy some time in The Crimea. And what about you? Taking another vacation?

BO: Really thinking about it right now. Listen, about Crimea… Um, would you mind just holding off for a bit?

VP: Why, Obamushka?

BO: Look, I’m out of red lines and some people expect me to come up with one.

VP: Red line? Is this new drug, like ecstasy?

BO: I wish… I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but the thing is, you going to Crimea looks like an act of war to some people, and frankly, I am trying my damnedest to get rid of OUR military right now, and you are making the argument to keep OUR military at current levels here. You have to work with me!

VP: I have to work with you?? Do I have to remind you who is my bitch here, Obamushka?

BO: No…..

VP: Good. Now, be a good cyka and keep rattling the saber. Your supporters still believe in you to transform your country. Just as my supporters believe in me to transform mine, da? Now, I have to go. My jackboots just came back from being shined.

Why so short a call? Putin probably kept Obama on hold for 80 minutes.

Jan 10

Legal Stupidity

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Friday, January 10, 2014 in Government, Idiotarians, Open Thread

Amazing how even dumb laws not only get passed, but stay on the books past their use.

Take my fair state. I love Texas, but sometimes you have to shake your head at some of the laws to which we still abide. Did you know that it is still illegal to take more than three sips of beer while standing?

Anyone been to a club or bar lately??

There are laws against sitting on the sidewalk, selling Limburger cheese, and if you steal cattle, you can STILL get hanged. By the way, people are hanged, inanimate objects are hung (SYWM!!!). In San Antonio, it is still illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation.

Anyone been to a club or bar lately??

caught lol

I understand that some of these were enacted in a different time, but Limburger???

What are some weird or stupid laws in your corner of the world? And have you bent it? ;)

Dec 16

Wealthcare.gov

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, December 16, 2013 in Government, ObamaCare

I shouldn’t laugh, y’all. This crap is serious, but sometimes I can’t help it.

For the second week in a row, the Washington Healthplanfinder website is down, and it’s causing problems for people who are dealing with billing issues. Some of them say the website is mistakenly debiting their accounts.

Shannon Bruner of Indianola logged on to her checking account Monday morning, and found she was almost 800 dollars in the negative.

“The first thing I thought was, ‘I got screwed,’” she said.

I am not laughing at their quandary. I am laughing at the fact that EVERYONE CALLED THIS. And still people didn’t listen.

One [KGW] viewer emailed KING 5 saying, “They drafted my account this morning for a second time.”

Amazing how the site can’t operate correctly, and is usually down, but damned if they can’t manage to get your money, TWICE.

Washington Healthplanfinder emailed the Bruners a few days ago telling them to log in to view their invoice, something they couldn’t do because the website has been down. The Bruners haven’t been able to get through on the helpline either. They finally contacted Healthplanfinder administrators by posting a message on their Facebook page.

Washington Healthplanfinder is reportedly looking into the problem. Meanwhile, the Bruners can’t go shopping for Christmas gifts, or even pay their nanny. I don’t even know if they have healthcare insurance.

But I do know the IRS won’t garnish their return. This year, anyway.

Dec 6

I Wish I Had Made This Up

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Friday, December 6, 2013 in Government, War

Seriously.

NORL-39 octopus logo

“NROL-39 is represented by the octopus, a versatile, adaptable, and highly intelligent creature. Emblematically, enemies of the United States can be reached no matter where they choose to hide,” said Karen Furgerson, a spokeswoman for the NRO. “‘Nothing is beyond our reach’ defines this mission and the value it brings to our nation and the warfighters it supports, who serve valiantly all over the globe, protecting our nation.”

Cthulhu was unavailable for comment.

Nov 18

Monday Morning LOL

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, November 18, 2013 in AssHatery, Idiotarians, Left Wing Media, Rants

I love perusing the social-site-with-faces. I get to see the funny stuff, get news links with you know, ACTUAL NEWS, updates about family and friends, and of course, the requisite LSD-fueled screeds that just make my mornings.

This Monday’s entry is from none other than the Puffy Ho®. Y’all can go look for it. I can’t link it here. I just showered and we are under water restrictions. Again. Anyway, it is titled, 12 Reasons Why Obama is One of the Best Presidents Ever.

Quit laughing. I haven’t even started fisking it yet. He begins with duality.

With tears in my eyes, and joy in my heart, I stood alongside people of color across the nation as we celebrated America’s first inauguration of a black president. As a young black man, I felt a true sense of patriotism as I witnessed our country rally together to show, finally, that we are more concerned about who is the most qualified man for the job, regardless of race or age.

Uh huh. So you are happy a black guy won but it has NOTHING to do with race. Got it.

He goes on to say that sure, the Prez has had a few missteps, just like any other president. He says that after he claims the predecessor was a “colossal failure”, ok? And then, hilarity ensues.

1-- He is one for The People.

As long as “The People” means his campaign contributors and apologists, sure.

2-- He is for civil rights.

Tell that to those still screaming for same sex marriage, to the whistleblowers who are in hiding for outing the NSA, and TEA Party members being given a colonoscopy by the IRS.

3-- He is for one race -the human race.

I did snarf at this. Thoughts of George Zimmerman, Sgt. James Crowley, the people threatened by the Black Panthers all come to mind. And if you think of that too, then you’re RACIST!!!

4-- He is for a healthcare system that brings hope and healing to the hurting.

But you can’t hope to keep your insurance or your doctor.

5-- He is for the middle class.

BWAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

*sniff, chortle*

BWAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Sorry, I can’t help it. Better to laugh than to think of the total debt accruing on the middle class’ shoulders.

6-- He is for women’s rights.

Meanwhile not a peep from him regarding the vile comments made at conservative women, such as Sarah Palin. But Hera forbid anyone take a swipe at Sandra Fluke and her $3,000 contraception.

7-- He is for doing away with pomp and circumstance.

Golfing, million dollar vacations, and monthly concerts by hip musicians do not count. And the Greek columns couldn’t be reached for comment.

8-- He is for the environment.

I don’t know about y’all, but I’m still waiting for the oceans to recede and the planet to heal.

9-- He is for veterans.

This, as he makes suggestions to change the benefits and attempts to charge them for their healthcare. This, as he shuts them out of their own memorial. By the way, how many brass have been fired now??

10-- He is for peace.

Syria, the Arab Spring, Iran, Afghanistan, Benghazi…..

11-- He is for education.

Common Core, anyone?

12-- He is for entertaining the masses.

TOTUS could not be reached for comment.

If y’all feel like reading the article, it’s under The Blog at the Puffy Ho®. But best be prepared to spew your drink and take a long shower afterwards.

 

Oct 9

Generation Bubblewrap

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Wednesday, October 9, 2013 in AssHatery, Government, Political Correctness

It started off as a good morning for me, perusing the social-site-with-faces, reading link after link about how truly destructive this Administration is, the random funneh, and some weird news for the day. It was all good until I read about the utter pussification of our children nowadays.

Then I got all pissed off and started honing things.

exercise stamps

These stamps that were to be issued by the USPS were inspired by the “Let’s Move!” Campaign. Personally, I find the campaign to be a waste of money and time, but every First Lady needs a cause. The stamps are somewhat generic, and though they skim the impressionistic arts, they are cute. But guess what? The entire run, ALL OF IT, will be destroyed, costing tens of thousands of dollars if not millions. At first I thought it was because no *ahem* kids with disabilities were portrayed. Or perhaps things were too “vanilla”, with the possible exception of the basketball player, and that’s another whole can of worms. No, the reason for the scrapping of the stamps is not due to the politically correct flavor of the day, but rather that kids may get hurt being active.

[T]he USPS will be destroying the entire press run after receiving concerns from the President’s Council on Fitness, Sports & Nutrition over alleged “unsafe” acts depicted on three of the stamps (cannonball dive, skateboarding without kneepads and a headstand without a helmet). (There’s also a batter without a batting helmet, a girl balancing on a slippery rock, and a soccer player without kneepads or shin pads.)

What the everloving SHIT?? Headstand without a helmet?? Since when is a helmet mandatory for a headstand?? This is how you raise drones and sheep, people. You scare them into thinking they will get hurt and die without the government telling them what they can and cannot do. My kids all had bike helmets and knee pads. Ask me how often they wore them. If you guess “once” you would be right. Sure, they got hurt, and they learned from their mistakes to do better next time, without the pampering. Why is it a crime to let a kid get a few bruises?

But hey, they just want what’s best for us. That is why the same people are in charge of our healthcare, our taxes, and our rights. So go ahead and wrap your kids in bubblewrap before letting them do anything remotely fun. It’s for The Greater Good™.

Hat tip: Michael Graham

UPDATE!!

Sorry for bumping the HOTW. Go look at her now and get some measure of happiness for today!!

Sep 21

One Less Thing to Watch

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Saturday, September 21, 2013 in Entertainment, Movies, Politics

Hollywood Reporter is breaking the the news that HBO Films is in talks with Jerry Weintraub to produce a new political film. Based on the book, Under Fire: The Untold Story of the Attack in Benghazi by Fred Burton and Sam Katz, the film is scheduled for debut 2015.

Yes, after the 2014 elections.

The book, published this month, has been billed as a heart-stopping narrative of the diplomatic mission’s efforts to fend off and escape a terrorist attack on Sept. 11, 2012, which resulted in the death of four, including U.S. Ambassador J. Christopher Stevens. Fire reveals the 12-hour ordeal confronted by Stevens, Sean Smith, his Diplomatic Security contingent and the CIA security specialists who raced to rescue them.

Lest you think HBO is breaking ground being the first to make a film about Benghazi, this came out after Thunder Road Pictures released their intentions to make a film based on the book, The Embassy House. A lot of people think this is a step in the right direction as far as telling the country (the world already knows; it’s our LIVs who don’t) what happened in Benghazi on September 11, 2012. Personally, I have my doubts that HBO will be even remotely unbiased in this attempt. It’s not like they have ever, ever, been biased before.

Sep 16

Your LOL For Monday

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, September 16, 2013 in Funny Pics, religion of piece

Things are pretty sad around here still, but in moments of sadness, we find joy in little things. This past Wednesday, bikers from around North America came down to counter the “Million American March Against Fear”, known better by it’s former name, “Million Muslim March”. Look, I firmly believe that everyone has a right to petition the government, etc., etc. Personally, I was supporting their right to gather and assemble. Sure, Muslims gathering to rouse people to their plight on the day some of their religious brethren attacked our country and took us to war would show them to be in bad taste and crying like spoiled children, but that is why I wanted them to do it. Sunlight is a great disinfectant.

Anyway, both the bikers and the pieceful religion peeps decided to launch Facebook groups to garner support. Here are screenshots of the groups timeline banners. Please read closely the amount of “likes” each page has.

bikers fb group

That’s the bikers’ group. The current count is 282,934 “likes”.

mamaf fb group

And this is the muslim group. The current count is 335 “likes”. JUST 335.

This is why I do think there is hope against this tide. Their support comes from trumped up political correctness, and we must start taking back our rights to vocabulary words and teach politicians that no one has a right not to be offended.

And we can start teaching the lesson by voting them out :D

Jul 22

This is What It Sounds Like, When Islam Cries

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, July 22, 2013 in Awesomeness, Government, Islamofascist nutjobs, religion of piece

North Carolina clangs its brass.

The state Senate on Friday passed a bill that would keep courts from recognizing Sharia law.

While proponents of the legislation said it would keep people safe from foreign laws, critics derided the bill as sending a message of intolerance and bigotry to followers of Islam.

Go ahead, laugh for a while. I did. It took me several minutes to stop. I mean, when the most intolerant religion-slash-political-ideology on this planet calls something “intolerant and bigoted”, you know you’re winning. The provision was actually attached to another measure that would impose stricter regulations on abortion providers in NC. But the libs were so busy trying to argue the abortion regulations that they didn’t even notice the itty bitty bill emphasizing Constitutional law as being supreme. It was rather glorious.

Now called House Bill 522, the provision’s contents haven’t changed. It reminds judges that the U.S. and N.C. constitutions are the law of the land and no foreign law can supersede them. Sometimes international laws are used in court as evidence before a judge, or in written opinions. But this bill would stop judges from considering foreign law when it violates a citizen’s constitutional rights.

I have a big problem with Shari’a law. A very big problem. That particular *ahem* rule of law tramples over my rights as a human being, not to mention as a woman, a mother and a Christian. And I find it hilarious that liberals are quick to defend its use over our rule of law, when its a religious rule of law. And by “hilarious”, I mean “sickening”. What about that whole “separation of church and state” stuff liberals are always shoving down our throats?

The danger doesn’t come from the legislation’s exact wording, said Omid Safi, a professor of religious studies at UNC-Chapel Hill. He contends this wave of anti-foreign-law legislation comes from a fundamental misunderstanding of Sharia law and a “bigoted” perception of Muslims.

“We would be delighted to have a conversation about what Sharia law actually is and what it is not,” he said. “It would be important, if we’re passing legislation on the topic, for (lawmakers who support the bill) to actually benefit from the expertise of people who might actually know something about the subject.”

Here’s the thing, Omar baby:

WE DON’T GIVE A SHIT WHAT SHARI’A IS OR ISN’T. WE ALSO DON’T GIVE A SHIT WHAT AN “EXPERT” ON IT HAS TO CONTRIBUTE. WHY? BECAUSE THE SUPREME LAW OF *THIS* COUNTRY IS THE U.S. CONSTITUTION. END OF FUCKING DISCUSSION.

And if you and your ilk don’t like it, go back to a country that does, fuck you very much.