“The average American has one ball and one tit. You now know everything you need to know about statistics.”— via David, Third World County, “Mr Natural’s Rules of Women and the Universe”–circa 1977

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Aug 15

A Quick Learner on Government Bureaucracy

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, August 15, 2011 in AssHatery, Government, ObamaCare

All you need to know:

**Pythagorean theorem:…………………………………………..24 words.

**Lord’s prayer:……………………………………………………….66 words.

**Archimedes’ Principle:…………………………………………..67 words.

**Ten Commandments:………………………………………….179 words.

**Gettysburg address:……………………………………………286 words.

**Declaration of Independence:……………………………..1,300 words.

**US Constitution with 27 Amendments:…………………7,818 words.

**US Government regulations on sale of cabbage:…..26,911 words.

**Obamacare:…………………………………………….400,000 words.

Hat tip: Blutarskyy

Aug 9

This Is Only a Test

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Tuesday, August 9, 2011 in Geekery, Politics

Well, it’s only a little quiz, really. And completely harmless and fun.You can’t fail, no one is here to grade you, and I was told there would be no math.

It’s the World’s Smallest Political Quiz.

Here are my results for 2011:

The last time I took this little quiz, it was 2007, and I was right above the letter “R” in “Right”. Quite a difference, n’est pas??

The times, they are a’changin’ ;)

Creatively borrowed from iOWT.

Update[ArmedGeek]: Here’s mine.

Aug 8

It’s For the Children…

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, August 8, 2011 in AssHatery, Government, Politics

Like it or hate it, we all have to deal with the boondoggle that is No Child Left Behind. In simple terms, the law was enacted to help schools bring kids into math and reading proficiency standards by 2014, using testing each spring. If the school doesn’t have the required percentage meet the goal, the school fails.

Which translates to firing of teachers. Guess who doesn’t like that?

So what is the administration to do? They decide to give schools waivers.

The plan to offer waivers to all 50 states, as long as they meet other school reform requirements, comes at the request of President Barack Obama, [Education Secretary Arne] Duncan said. More details on the waivers will come in September, he said.

Hey, it worked for Obamacare, right??

Through the waivers, schools will get some relief from looming deadlines to meet testing goals as long as they agree to embrace other kinds of education reforms such as raising standards, helping teachers and principals improve, and focusing on fixing the lowest performing schools.

But these waivers do NOT state how high the standards should be met, the amount of improvement of teachers and administrators should reach, or the definition of “fixing” the lowest performing schools. You just have to show that you are doing something, anything. And usually that means hiring more staff, forming another task force, etc. According to Duncan, about 80% of schools are in danger of closing if these waivers are not sent out. And though some schools are about to face sanctions under the law, there is no accounting for that high estimate, even from education experts.

But hey, public schools are just too big to fail.

Aug 1

Monday Howler

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, August 1, 2011 in AssHatery, Idiotarians, Left Wing Media, Total Bullshit

Sometimes, it’s just too easy.

I was reading the headlines at Drudge, when I saw this one:

How the Tea Party Won the Deal

That seemed to me to be a bit…odd. No one denies the TEA Party is influential. That goes without saying. But we aren’t a “party”, for one, and to find that as a headline from a news source (and I use that term loosely) is a bit surprising. So I go on to read the article, and end up having to wipe coffee off my keys.

While the details of the debt ceiling deal remain fuzzy, this much is clear: Barack Obama may be president, but the Tea Party is now running Washington. How did this happen? Simple; this is what American politics looks like when there’s no left-wing movement and no war.

No left-wing movement?? REALLY??? If there were no left-wing movement, there would be no Obamacare, no government takeover of banks or carmakers, no push to have the UN regulate our guns, etc. And what the hell is going on in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Libya, you moron?? It ain’t coffee klatches, you know. No matter what new term this administration gives them, we are still fighting wars in three theaters, and the one your Prez is solely responsible for pulling out of his ass is the one that has NO Congressional approval, you Kool-Aid drinking dolt.

The writer, from the Daily Beast, which should tell you something, goes on to say that the liberals are mad because the Prez agreed to cuts without raising revenues. Then he bring up the Bush tax cuts, because you can’t have an article without blaming Bush somewhere. He goes on to babble:

since the economy collapsed in 2008, only one grassroots movement has emerged in response, and it’s been a movement of the right.

Uh, no. The TEA Party has no affiliation. “TEA” stands for “Taxed Enough Already”, and though most of it’s members hail from the right, I can attest to personally knowing members who are democrats and liberals. This is the group that Nancy Pelosi called “astroturf”, remember? And has the author forgotten about the “Coffee Party”, rising in response to the TEA Party?

I had to read the next bit of tripe twice to really let it sink in.

Obama, like FDR, had a reasonably successful first two years: a stimulus package that while too small for the circumstances was still large by historical standards and a health care bill that while subpar in myriad ways still far exceeded the efforts of other recent Democratic presidents.

He credits the Prez with passing the Stimulus, which he had just blamed Bush for, but says it was too small for the circumstances. He does admit the healthcare bill has “issues”, but really nothing-to-worry-about-move-along-a-Dem-Prez-passed-it-so-it’s-ok.

Perhaps it’s because Obama didn’t take on Wall Street, perhaps it’s because with labor unions so weak there’s just not the organizational muscle to create such a movement, perhaps it’s because trust in government is so low that pro-government populism is almost impossible.

Didn’t take on Wall Street?? Labor unions are weak?? What the hell is he talking about? Was he not around when Obama was pushing for “Wall Street reform”?? And is he not aware of all the strong-arming by the NLRB to Boeing right now, and the “campout” in Wisconsin? I’ll give him the trust in government, though.

He goes on the blame Bush for the 2004 prescription drug bill, which the LEFT wanted, because (I am serious here), he wanted to be re-elected so he could perpetuate the War on Terror. I couldn’t make this up if I were drunk and on antihistamines.

The good news is that the Tea Party, more than Barack Obama, has now ended the neoconservative dream of an ever-expanding American empire. The bad news is that it has also ended whatever hopes liberals once entertained that roughly 100 years after Theodore Roosevelt and Woodrow Wilson, roughly 75 years after the New Deal and roughly 50 years after the Great Society, we were living in another great age of progressive reform.

American empire?? Ever-expanding? Our so-called “empire” has not expanded since …… yeah, that long. If he thinks we went to Iraq and Afghanistan for real estate, he is seriously deluded. One thing I do know: if “neocons” wanted to expand an “empire”, we would have done it on a more tropical area. And far closer to home. I’m looking at Acapulco.

But the thing that gave me the heaves was that “progressive reform” barf. He is one of those that believes that Socialism will work heeeeere. And what is he talking about when he says “another age”? He’s talking about FDR, and the New Deal. But he forgets FDR had a MASSIVE war going on, too.

The last paragraph made me smile, though:

Given the era of fiscal scarcity we’re now entering, those neocon and progressive dreams are now likely dead for many years to come. Meanwhile, the Tea Party’s dream of a government reduced to its pre-welfare state size becomes ever real.

That’s right, you idiot. We are in this era because government spent more money than it was taking in. And now the TEA Party is telling the gov’t that it, too, has to live within its means.

Honestly, does that writer even balance his own checkbook??

Jul 26

And Over to the Center

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Tuesday, July 26, 2011 in Government, Politics, Rants

I have a confession to make.

I watched the Prez’ speech. It was only a small bit of it, I swear. STOP JUDGING ME!! He started off by blaming Bush, no surprise there, and went on to ‘splain to the little people that you have to spend more during a recession. But then he shifted gears a bit, telling the masses that neither party is blameless for this, but both have a responsibility to stop it. My ears perked up then. And then, the hammer:

Keep in mind that under a balanced approach, the 98% of Americans who make under $250,000 would see no tax increases at all. None.  In fact, I want to extend the payroll tax cut for working families.  What we’re talking about under a balanced approach is asking Americans whose incomes have gone up the most over the last decade – millionaires and billionaires – to share in the sacrifice everyone else has to make.  And I think these patriotic Americans are willing to pitch in.  In fact, over the last few decades, they’ve pitched in every time we passed a bipartisan deal to reduce the deficit.  The first time a deal passed, a predecessor of mine made the case for a balanced approach by saying this:

“Would you rather reduce deficits and interest rates by raising revenue from those who are not now paying their fair share, or would you rather accept larger budget deficits, higher interest rates, and higher unemployment?  And I think I know your answer.”

Yes, he invoked Reagan, too. That wasn’t the surprise, since his administration has been trying for months to make him look Reaganesque. No, the surprise was in the bold text. He mentioned “balanced approach” several times. This speech was NOT about the economy, the debt ceiling, the budget, or anything serious and emergent. This was a campaign speech, pure and simple. And he goes on to prove my point:

Most Americans, regardless of political party, don’t understand how we can ask a senior citizen to pay more for her Medicare before we ask corporate jet owners and oil companies to give up tax breaks that other companies don’t get.  How can we ask a student to pay more for college before we ask hedge fund managers to stop paying taxes at a lower rate than their secretaries?  How can we slash funding for education and clean energy before we ask people like me to give up tax breaks we don’t need and didn’t ask for?

That’s not right.  It’s not fair. We all want a government that lives within its means, but there are still things we need to pay for as a country – things like new roads and bridges; weather satellites and food inspection; services to veterans and medical research.

Notice the wedges he is driving between “classes” of people as he defines them, pitting senior citizens against corporate jet owners, (it’s always corporate jet owners), students against hedge fund managers, (making sure to twist a bit of Warren Buffett’s secretary administrative assistant’s tax woes), and ending with a hue and cry for the Departments of Education and Energy, which coincidentally, are the two departments at the top of the conservatives’ “To Abolish List”.

And then he gives us the famous liberal canard: IT’S NOT FAIR!!! We in the real world have news for the Prez and his followers: Life is never fair. She never once claimed to be, and if you had a grasp of reality, you would see that Life laughs at you at every turn. And what weather satellites? I thought NASA had been relegated to do Muslim Outreach? And medical research?? Do NOT get me started…

I had to cut it off by then. I was done listening to campaign speeches back in 2008. I hope Boehner keeps that rod of iron in his spine a bit longer, or he may find it shoved somewhere else come 2012.

Jul 21

Calling Bluffs

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Thursday, July 21, 2011 in AssHatery, Government, Politics, Total Bullshit

It appears now that the White House is….what is the term?-- oh, right, caving.

White House Moves to Give Congress More Time to Strike Debt Deal

It was inevitable, and Cantor knew it. The Prez kept talking about “spreadsheets” and “bills” on his desk, but never actually produced any of them for the public. He talked about all the cuts on the bills, all of the so-called changes in entitlements. But as Charles Krauthammer pointed out, the Prez never elaborated on any.

Carney said that given the constraints, the president would be willing to support a “very short-term extension” if a broader deal is reached by the deadline and lawmakers just need more time to work out the details. President Obama all along has said he opposes a short-term deal — something Republicans had floated earlier. Carney reiterated that Obama’s opposition stands to “a toll booth kind of series of provisions that temporarily or in a limited fashion raise the debt ceiling.” But he said the president would make an “exception” if a deal is reached “to allow a bit of extra time for a bill to work its way through the legislative process.”

Basically, this is like giving a scuba diver three more breaths of oxygen in his almost-depleted tank. Add to that the proposal by the “Gang of Six” that the White House is schmoozing along, the one to cut deficits by $3.7 trillion over the next decade and raise the debt ceiling, and you have a prez worried about missing his birthday party.

Now, I don’t know about y’all, but where I come from, “gangs” tend to be deadly, and frankly, anything that this prez supports makes me nervous, as in “if he likes it, we’re all screwed”. Bipartisanship only works when the Republicans bend over. Why should this “gang” be any different?

At least the Prez is looking like the selfish socialist he really is.

Jul 12

The Boogeyman Cometh

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Tuesday, July 12, 2011 in AssHatery, Politics, Total Bullshit

After yesterday’s debacle of a conference, you would think that the Prez would stop digging. First he flip-flops, then he tells us we are too stupid to understand the debt crisis:

But a crisis is nothing without the Eternal Boogeyman:

President Obama on Tuesday said he cannot guarantee that retirees will receive their Social Security checks August 3 if Democrats and Republicans in Washington do not reach an agreement on reducing the deficit in the coming weeks.

And yet, nowhere in that article is any mention of the simple fact that Social Security and Medicare are actually protected from default!! There is no way that these checks wouldn’t be sent out. However, he does go on:

Mr. Obama told Pelley “this is not just a matter of Social Security checks. These are veterans checks, these are folks on disability and their checks. There are about 70 million checks that go out.”

Those check to the military and reitrees?? Oh yeah….those are fair game to this administration. And do you know why? Because the administration is trying to head off a PR maelstrom of epic proportions:

Short story, all of the important functions of government, i.e national security, the military, air traffic control, border security, Social Security payments, etc., will continue to function. The parts that have to shut down…well, lets just say they are candidates for permanent cuts.

But what happens when you force the military to work with no pay? You get low morale, you get desperate housewives and husbands, you get people screaming to their congressmen to give them their hard-earned money. And it is hard-earned. And those people screaming will get far more attention from congressmen than welfare dependents. And that is what this administration is counting on.

What this administration forgets is we know when we are being used as gambits. And we will remember.

Second link hat tip to LC Draco.

 

Jul 11

Double Speak

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Monday, July 11, 2011 in AssHatery, Politics

In between being a mom and keeping the kids entertained, I decided to go slumming, and tuned in to CNN.

STOP JUDGING ME!!!

Anyway, as I was listening to the live news conference from our Prez, I was shocked, as in “water is wet” shocked, to hear him say that no one is wanting to raise taxes, but he needs to convince people we need to “increase” revenues. And in a surprising Emperor-is-Nekkid move, CNN actually posted the live blogging.

Hey, lets go after the corporate jet peeps again!!! Has he even looked to see just how many of them contributed to his campaign? Then he goes on, revealing what really matters:

New programs?? MORE programs?? And since when is this so-called NFL issue a government problem to address? Finally, he traps himself:

Hard things? We aren’t avoiding them, Mr. Prez. WE THE PEOPLE have been screaming for you and your ilk on the left and right to stop spending money we do NOT have. YOU are avoiding doing your job. YOU are avoiding reality.

And with any luck, YOU will be avoiding long lines at the unemployment center come 2013.

 

Jun 4

Random Crap for a Saturday Morning

Posted by ArmedGeek on Saturday, June 4, 2011 in Bonus Hooker, News

First a couple of graphs (I’m sure you’ve seen them):

Fucking hell, that’s disturbing …. have a Hooker:

That’s better. Next we have Charles Krauthammer being … well, being a Fucking North East Establishment Republican™ :

Video here:

Let’s just say that Charles Krauthammer is not a big Sarah Palin fan.
The FOX News analyst told Bill O’Reilly, “It makes no sense for her to run… The problem is she is not schooled.”

And more recently:

Charles Krauthammer continued his attacks on Sarah Palin tonight.
The FOX News analyst now says it’s not her turn but that she will do well as kingmaker just like last year.

Yeah, being his “turn” is what got McCain nominated … its also what got Bob Dole nominated.

Fuck … need another Hooker:

Ahhh, that’s better.

And here we have Romney trying to take himself out of the race(link to HotAir, cause I’m not linking Reuters):

“I believe the world is getting warmer, and I believe that humans have contributed to that,” he told a crowd of about 200 at a town hall meeting in Manchester, New Hampshire.

“It’s important for us to reduce our emissions of pollutants and greenhouse gases that may be significant contributors.”

Prayer at Texas graduation ceremonies relegalized:

Public prayer will be allowed at a Texas high school graduation after a federal appeals court on Friday reversed a ban won by an agnostic family that claimed ceremony traditions such as invocations were unconstitutional.

Rick Perry had this to say:

“I’m proud that the Fifth Circuit Court has overturned the lower court’s order that banned prayer at a Texas high school graduation. I’m thankful for Attorney General Abbott’s leadership in ensuring the First Amendment, which prohibits governments from interfering with Americans’ rights to freely express their religious beliefs, is protected. Texas will continue to fight for the rights of all those who wish to pray in our state.”

Hrm, well, that’s good news but lets have a Hooker anyway:

At least Congress noticed Libya:

Crossing party lines to deliver a stunning rebuke to the commander in chief, the vast majority of the House voted Friday for resolutions telling President Obama he has broken the constitutional chain of authority by committing U.S. troops to the international military mission in Libya.

Although, I honestly don’t expect anything to come of this and I fully expect Obama to ignore Congress while he bashes them in the media.

Jack Kevorkian died.

Whitehouse: Poor jobs numbers are ‘bumps on the road to recovery’.

Hooker time!

God Bless Yoga Pants!

Well, if that doesn’t give you your morning ups and downs I don’t know what will.

May 26

TSA Calls, Texas Folds

Posted by LC Aggie Sith on Thursday, May 26, 2011 in AssHatery, Politics, terrorism, Total Bullshit

Some of y’all may be aware of this, but my great state was on the verge of passing a law making TSA invasive pat-downs a felony. HB 1937, which basically would have made it “[a] criminal act for security personnel to touch a person’s private areas without probable cause as a condition of travel or as a condition of entry into a public place,” had passed the Texas House with a vote of 138-0. Yes, you read that correctly. There was no single vote against this bill in the House. After the House vote, it went to the Senate. And in a supreme act of cowardice, they caved to the federal government.

Dewhurst has said the bill did not have the votes to pass, a fact he learned after the debate began. Patrick pulled down the bill from consideration after the debate began, and a vote never took place. The bill had lost support after senators had learned that federal officials had warned that such ban would violate federal law and could bring court challenges and airport shutdowns.

Excuse me, but what law would that be? Well, according to the federales, that would be the Supremacy Clause. According to the TSA, the Supremacy Clause prevents states from regulating the federal government. According to the Constitution, though, it states that federal law made adherent to the Constitution is above states’ laws. Totally different than what the TSA claims.

But you may ask, what caused the State Senate to cave in such a manner? That’s simple: extortion:

If HR [sic] 1937 were enacted, the federal government would likely seek an emergency stay of the statute. Unless or until such a stay were granted, TSA would likely be required to cancel any flight or series of flights for which it could not ensure the safety of passengers and crew.

We urge that you consider the ramifications of this bill before casting your vote.

They can’t even get the name of the bill right. According to Lt. Gov. Dewhurst, they “didn’t have the votes” to pass the bill. Well, then, actually TAKING the vote on it wouldn’t have mattered, and the bill wouldn’t have passed anyway, so why bother pulling it?? When did the TSA become so powerful that they can dictate who can fly in or out of a state? When did they become so powerful that they can extort states? Whatever happened to the Fourth Amendment to the Constitution of the United States??

If this is in the name of “transportation security”, why were there TSA patdowns conducted at a high school prom?

TSA could not be reached for comment.